The Gooks Are At It Again

Menno · Post by **Menno** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 12:10 am

Lucasarts sent me an email showcasing their new game "MERCENARIES". It's about some china-man general who gets whacky ideas to stage a coup, gun-toting negroes, and an "OMG INTERNATIONAL FARCE" [hmm, all this sounds familiar] and...oh hell, I'll just let them describe it.

From their site

Availability: Fall 2004
Genre: Action
Platform: XBox, PlayStation 2
ESRB: Rating Pending

Mercenaries is a revolutionary, 3rd person action-shooter game set in the near future and inspired by real world events. On the eve of a historic reunification of North and South Korea, a ruthless general stages a military coup to take control of North Korea and threatens the world with nuclear war. The international community launches a global task force to stabilize the region. However, when diplomatic efforts collapse and the region descends into anarchy they announce a one hundred million dollar bounty on the North Korean general and his top military and scientific advisors. The targets are identified in a ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬Ã…â€œmost wantedÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬? list in the form of a 52-card deck of playing cards. As one of the top operatives for a private mercenaries company called Executive Operations, you have been called in to collect on these bounties.

-Massive, open environments that are completely interactive. If you can see it, you can use it, steal it, drive it, fly it, or blow it up.

-Explosive combat - you have the firepower (choose from a huge arsenal of realistic, military weapons) to lay waste to anything in sight.

-Flexible gameplay - Use your weapons and your imagination to figure out how to complete missions in a variety of ways in non-scripted environments.

-Dozens of different military and civilian vehicles, ranging from tanks, cars, trucks, helicopters, and more that can be commandeered at anytime and used for any purpose.

-Some of the best graphics seen on the consoles - great weather and realistic explosion/destruction effects.

-Based on the US militaryÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢s system of identifying a ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬Ã…â€œmost wantedÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬? list of enemy targets in a playing card deck, players will use the playing card metaphor to identify missions and enemy targets. Take on missions from the different factions in order to gain intelligence and get new playing cards/targets and access to new areas.

-Reputation system that is driven by an embedded journalist that records player actions, which determines how civilians and the various warring factions respond to the player.

-Earn cash from different missions to buy better weapons and vehicles, or sell your vehicles and weapons on the black market.

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I found it funny that they're taunting the "Playing card deck" theme [from Iraq] as a feature of the game; like the average player is really going to give a shit. I'LL TRADE U HUSSEIN FOR KIM JONG II

Plus the game will have an embedded journalist, who'll lie and trump up atrocities. AWESOME CAN'T WAIT ITS LIKE BEING IN THE MILITARY ALL OVER AGAIN

It also has "great weather effects", which is a must for every game I buy [sarcasm].

Menno · Post by **Menno** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 12:16 am

Oh, since I know how you console kiddies are all about the graphics, here's a screenshot of some idiots being blown away.

CloudNineGT · Post by **CloudNineGT** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 2:56 am

That looks worse then Half-Life did.

jetbaby · Post by **jetbaby** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 4:37 am

Oh, it looks like a keeper alright... keep in the sewer with the rest of the shit.

Wolfman Walt · Post by **Wolfman Walt** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 4:38 am

It looks like they're hugging each other or something.

Strap · Post by **Strap** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 6:51 am

He is being lifted to safety by the terrorist fairy.

I really hope that video games take a turn back into good story and less graphics...

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 7:12 am

This sucks. Operation Flashpoint looks better on my 333 Mhz Celeron. If this game is supposedly all about graphics, then I sure as hell ain't buying it.

SDMVersion3 · Post by **SDMVersion3** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 10:25 am

Looks like those two soldiers were sneaking in some quicky sodomy when they got blown to shit.

Don't tell me they make games where you go around killing gays now?

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 2:03 pm

Lucasarts should keep to SW, S&M and Full Throttle.

BlackDog · Post by **BlackDog** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 8:56 pm

I'd make a comment on the game, but once again I'm boggled by the racism of people on this forum.

Is the great majority of people here in the KKK or the Arian Nation or something?

Will · Post by **Will** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 10:03 pm

Nah, I think most people here just like to use racist language to provoke, or show their disdain for political correctness, or something like that. Ya stupid spic greaser.

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 10:14 pm

stfu nig-nog or I'll have to BASH YER!

I think the game looks pretty good, very Y2K!

Viktor · Post by **Viktor** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 1:41 am

The screenshot looks like DF:BHD played on a really shite PC.

"The international community launches a global task force to stabilize the region. "

Last time that worked was WW2.

"-Explosive combat - you have the firepower (choose from a huge arsenal of realistic, military weapons) to lay waste to anything in sight."

You obviously don't get the chance to play as the British Army then....

SDMVersion3 · Post by **SDMVersion3** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 9:55 am

BlackDog wrote:I'd make a comment on the game, but once again I'm boggled by the racism of people on this forum.

Hahahaha he has enimnem as an av oh the irony...

Wolfman Walt · Post by **Wolfman Walt** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:03 am

Its funny how everyone thinks that thats Eminem, seriousily.

avenger69ie · Post by **avenger69ie** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:24 am

isnt it the toecutters man-bitch? or some other geezah from mad max?

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 2:05 pm

Jews.

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:37 pm

>> I'm boggled by the racism of people on this forum. <<

Well no shit.
Can I call you Mr. Obvious now

Please, please, pretty please?

Bleusilences · Post by **Bleusilences** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 10:54 pm

See my operation flashpoint : the arcade game tread. It seem like a very good game and there is no denial that it look better then flashpoint because falshpoint. And btw it doesnt run on a 333 mhz celeron.

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Thu Mar 18, 2004 6:36 pm

That was the point, dude.

Duck and Cover

The Gooks Are At It Again

Would You Buy Mercenaries?

The Gooks Are At It Again