Hitchhiker's Guide: it kind of sucks

Mr. Teatime · Post by **Mr. Teatime** » Sat Apr 30, 2005 10:53 pm

[Film & TV -> Review] - More info on <a href="http://wikipocalypse.duckandcover.cx/in ... title=Duck and Cover">Community: Duck and Cover</a> | More info on <a href="http://wikipocalypse.duckandcover.cx/in ... ?title=The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy">Film & TV: The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy</a>

We've covered this film for a while because it's post-apocalyptic
with a twist. There have been mostly positive reviews, with one
spectacularly negative review on <a target="_self" href="http://www.planetmagrathea.com/">Planet Magrathea</a> standing out as being the best written one (the site is currently offline).I
haven't seen the film myself and don't intend to now, as the DaC
verdict from those who have seen it is 'eh'. You can read some
mini-reviews <a target="_self" href="../../forums/viewtopic.php?t=12015">here</a>,
though the feeling I get is that the film makers are fans of the books
but don't really know what they're doing with them when transcribing to
film. So I guess it could have been worse, but...... Land of the Dead better not be disappointing.

Matt_Helm · Post by **Matt_Helm** » Sun May 01, 2005 12:51 am

I'm going to see it tomorrow. My favourite incarnation of HHGTG is the original BBC radio plays, and in every incarnation after the radio plays (books, TV) Adams changed the story to suit his muse, so the idea that changes were made to the movie version is not that shocking.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Sun May 01, 2005 8:40 pm

I saw it last night. The only good acting in the entire movie was John Malkovich, and possibly the mice. I really enjoyed the voice for the Heart of Gold, too. Everyone else was really crappy.

The character for Zaphod was absolutely rubbish....He was 90% stupid, 10% horny. The "second head in the neck" thing was really poorly done. Couldn't they have pulled a "Men in Black" with the second head?

Mos Def, or whoever played Ford really had some crappy lines, too. He giggled all the damn time, and was pretty difficult to understand much of the rest of the time. His deep business like voice was just not right for the part, at all. His whole role in the movie was to explain things, and he did...to a degree.

Marvin was just shit. Nothing at all redeeming about him except near the end.

Trillian had no personality.

Arthur was...Well, this guy did okay. He didn't seem as intelligent as I imagined the character to be, but for this movie, it was acceptable.

The dolphin's "musical number" sucked as it was just a bunch of stock footage of dolphins jumping around while a song played.

The Vogons kicked ass. Exactly how I imagined them, except there was a little skittish Vogon with hair that was sort of a kiss-ass secretary, or something. No idea what that was all about, but most of the scenes involving the Vogons were excellent. Best parts of the movie, in my opinion.

Deep Thought was really great, too. The computer had more personality than any of the human/android actors in the entire film. I would have a conversation with Deep Thought.

Visuals were quite amazing, and I was pleased that they kept to puppets/costumes rather than CG. Hell, even the CG parts were top knotch. Very nice, indeed.

This movie would have been a B or a C+ if it had better actors. (My only real gripe other than butchering 5 books into one short film). As the movie sits, I give it a D+.

Nicolai · Post by **Nicolai** » Sun May 01, 2005 9:00 pm

I always thought that Trillian was a rather shallow character, she just followed Zaphod around and kept her mouth shut.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Sun May 01, 2005 9:02 pm

Aw, crap. So it IS, after all, based off the 5 books?

And yeah, even in the books, Trillian was a pretty shitty character.

Spazmo · Post by **Spazmo** » Sun May 01, 2005 9:15 pm

No, it's only an utterly mangled version of the first book. The complete lack of any element whatsoever from the four other books should have been a clue, Ryno.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Sun May 01, 2005 9:28 pm

Doesn't Marvin die? I'm pretty sure he doesn't die in the first book

Nicolai · Post by **Nicolai** » Sun May 01, 2005 9:30 pm

Nah, Marvin was in all the books.

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Sun May 01, 2005 10:52 pm

at the end he plays cricket with a nuclear bomb and a whale falls on him at the end of the universe where he meets a rock-star played by a cgi douglas adams

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Mon May 02, 2005 1:02 am

Spazmo wrote:No, it's only an utterly mangled version of the first book. The complete lack of any element whatsoever from the four other books should have been a clue, Ryno.

So they rebuild and replace Earth in the first book? And then there was the happy ending with everyone falling in love and going off into the sunset. Seems like they wrapped up all the books with one really shitty movie. No room left for any sequel, not that I'd watch any.

Spazmo · Post by **Spazmo** » Mon May 02, 2005 1:20 am

ExtremeRyno wrote:So they rebuild and replace Earth in the first book?

IIRC... yeah, they do. The mice just give up on their plan to replace Earth when they find out Arthur's brain is availible.

And then there was the happy ending with everyone falling in love and going off into the sunset.

That doesn't happen in any of the books.

Seems like they wrapped up all the books with one really shitty movie.

No, it doesn't, because there was no Restaurant at the End of the Universe, there was no Zaphod's search for the true leader of the galaxy, there were no Golgafrinchans, there were no Krikkit robots, there was no Aagrajag, there was no Arthur's return to Earth to meet a new girlfriend, there was no... whatever happens in Mostly Harmless. It's just a massive, shitty rewrite of the first book.

No room left for any sequel, not that I'd watch any.

Hear hear.

Father_Ted · Post by **Father_Ted** » Mon May 02, 2005 5:43 am

Spazmo wrote:No, it doesn't, because there was no Restaurant at the End of the Universe, there was no Zaphod's search for the true leader of the galaxy, there were no Golgafrinchans, there were no Krikkit robots, there was no Aagrajag, there was no Arthur's return to Earth to meet a new girlfriend, there was no... whatever happens in Mostly Harmless. It's just a massive, shitty rewrite of the first book.

Not that I like sticking my neck out on this film's behalf, but it did include a bit that I enjoyed from the beginning of The Restaurant at the End of the Universe about the creation of the Universe being "a bad move" and the 50-armed aliens who believe they were sneezed into existence.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Mon May 02, 2005 1:43 pm

Eh, sounds like shit, I doubt I'll see it. I'm not too sad they didn't include Arthur's second love story, though, as most of it was a boring.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:15 am

I've restarted re-reading the series again. I have nothing better to do.

Post by **King of Creation** » Tue May 03, 2005 3:40 am

I think I might go see it next week. Since there are no movie theathers around school, I've gotta wait until finals are done with.

Europa13 · Post by **Europa13** » Tue May 03, 2005 6:11 am

Well, it actually has done really well, right now it's in the #1 slot with $21.7 million and thats in the first week.

Any ways, I haven't seen it yet myself because of my schedual, hopefully I'll get to see it sometime this week...

The worst movie I ever saw, perhaps Druids... God that was wretched.

1. "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy," $21.7 million.

2. "The Interpreter," $14.2 million.

3. "XXX: State of the Union," $13.7 million.

4. "The Amityville Horror," $8.1 million.

5. "Sahara," $6 million.

6. "A Lot Like Love," $5.2 million.

7. "Kung Fu Hustle," $3.8 million.

8. "Fever Pitch," $3.75 million.

9. "Robots," $2.65 million.

10. "Guess Who," $2.2 million.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue May 03, 2005 1:39 pm

The actual state of the movie industry is very bad.

Europa13 · Post by **Europa13** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:27 pm

S4ur0n27 wrote:The actual state of the movie industry is very bad.

Yeah? Well, the overall state of our society sucks too... You know what they say... If you want a good meassure of what a society is about, check those who the soceity holds in high regards; you know, actors, actresses, lawyers, politians, etc...

People are being made stupid and this is being reinforced by the media/pop culture... They don't want successfull people, they want slaves to the industrial complex... They want consumers who act on impulse.

Post by **King of Creation** » Tue May 03, 2005 3:15 pm

Are you from the US? Cause we're the worst off right now. Our government is turning into a minority backed Theocratic Oligarchy. We've gotta wait until MY generation starts taking control for fucking shit to straighten out. Ever wonder why colleges are more liberal than not? It's because it's more freaking logical, and only ignorant religious fantatics like our half brain dead President.

Spazmo · Post by **Spazmo** » Tue May 03, 2005 3:31 pm

I once heard attributed to Churchill an excellent quote which I'm paraphrasing because I can never remember the exact phrasing of quotes -

"Any young man who is not a liberal is heartless. Any old man who is not a conservative is a fool."

Anyways, viz. Bush, America being doomed, the USA dragging everyone else down with it, etc.: you've had worse before, you'll have worse down the road. I'm not saying just give up, but quit shitting your pants all over my internet, please.