Alien invasion in my house

Subhuman · Post by **Subhuman** » Fri May 02, 2008 3:42 am

I can't stand bees and wasps. I've only recently gotten to the point where one can fly near me and I won't recoil and start looking for the nearest exit. Spiders I'm actually okay with, maybe because the cynical part of me finds a fear of spiders so clichÃ©. Cockroaches, same deal. They're basically harmless and don't scare me so much as gross me out. Ladybugs bother me more than roaches, frankly.

Nooke · Post by **Nooke** » Fri May 02, 2008 9:53 am

You have a typical death-from-above phobia. You don't seem to be afraid of crawlers, but flyers scare the fuck out of you. Also, some cockroaches can fly.

I hate maggots and grubs and when they are too close I get into some kind of grossness-paralysis, where I am so disgusted that I can't even escape. Oh shit, now I told you my only weakness besides 13 year old girls in bikinis.

Edit: Not all grubs gross me out though. I've actually eaten grilled grubs on my travels. Some taste like the stuff in Ferrerro Rocher, some like condense milk and some like snot. Pretty adventurous but nutritious.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Fri May 02, 2008 4:12 pm

atoga wrote:
nooke wrote:You all fucking suck with your bug-phobias and whatnot.
qfe

i've started seeing centipedes in my home in the past couple of weeks, bug fuckers maybe 4 inches long. however, they're clearly as disgusted by me as i am by them, so they're not a problem. they hate light, perhaps if you created an elaborate setup of lights in your house so that every surface was fully illuminated day and nite they'd leave you alone?

i'm cool with most bugs, & i'll happily have any kind of non-deadly spider crawling on me. the only bugs i can't stand are caterpillars, i'll freak out and probably start screaming if one gets on me. their movement causes my brain to recoil in horror. i DID have 6-10 of them on me at once when i was younger, though, and one of them was in my eye for a minute, so at least the phobia has a discernible root. does anyone else share this silly fear?

Eh? Caterpillar are awesome, whenever I see one I need to pick it up and pet it

As a kid I used to pick them up and set up a house or whatever for them in a mason jar, and kept them until they turned into butterflies.

Nooke · Post by **Nooke** » Fri May 02, 2008 5:38 pm

We have caterpillars that cause a painful rash when you touch them.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Fri May 02, 2008 7:46 pm

It's a civilized world around here.

Goretheglowingone · Post by **Goretheglowingone** » Thu May 08, 2008 5:17 am

there are only a few things in this world that i fear.

radiation.

maggots (i despise them)

thos parisitic catfish in south america that
swim up your pee hole and make you get castrated... AAAAHHHHHGGG!

spokomptonjdub · Post by **spokomptonjdub** » Thu May 08, 2008 5:36 am

Goretheglowingone wrote:
thos parisitic catfish in south america that
swim up your pee hole and make you get castrated... AAAAHHHHHGGG!

That would be the dreaded Candiru:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru

cdoublejj · Post by **cdoublejj** » Thu May 08, 2008 7:18 am

Nooke wrote:We have caterpillars that cause a painful rash when you touch them.

Hahahaha cool. I've heard of poisonous ones that can kill. If i had to be near a candiru i'd wear a condom... or 2.

Slaughter_Manslaught · Wed May 21, 2008 6:38 am

spokomptonjdub wrote:
Goretheglowingone wrote:
thos parisitic catfish in south america that
swim up your pee hole and make you get castrated... AAAAHHHHHGGG!
That would be the dreaded Candiru:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru

Ah, those nasty little fuckers usually go around in the darkest reaches of good ole Amazon River. Just don't urinate in the water.

And I FUCKING HATE ALL BUGS AND ARACHNAIDS AND WHATNOT THAT LIVE IN EARTH!! They. Should. Die. Screaming.

Dreadnought · Post by **Dreadnought** » Wed May 21, 2008 7:00 am

spokomptonjdub wrote:
Goretheglowingone wrote:
thos parisitic catfish in south america that
swim up your pee hole and make you get castrated... AAAAHHHHHGGG!
That would be the dreaded Candiru:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru

I sense new fetish possibilities. :BME:

Thor Kaufman · Post by **Thor Kaufman** » Wed May 21, 2008 10:10 am

2Girls1urethra

Post by **DarkUnderlord** » Wed May 21, 2008 2:49 pm

Goretheglowingone wrote:oh and you should see the taranchula migration..
you'll be driving along a desert road at night and all of a sudden the yellow line disappears and it sound like your running over chicken bones, and you stop for a moment and peer at what the headlights are illuminating and you notice THE WHOLE FUCKING ROAD IS MOVING!
covered with tarantulas all moving in one direction , like lemmings from hell.

And then they all start to crawl up the car and into the wheels and through your floor AND THEY EAT YOU.

Dreadnought · Post by **Dreadnought** » Wed May 21, 2008 3:05 pm

Actually you should catch and eat them. They're pretty tasty and nutritious.

Kahgan · Post by **Kahgan** » Sat May 24, 2008 11:39 am

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Meta_menardi.jpg
this is the worst creeps I see here in Norway, and they scare me shitless, I've seen them 2-3 cm long without their legs, and that's far to big for me. I'm fucking glad I don't live further south in the world.

Goretheglowingone · Post by **Goretheglowingone** » Tue May 27, 2008 5:05 am

is that it?

rabidpeanut · Post by **rabidpeanut** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:52 am

Seriously, that is the most swell guy 'scary' arachnid i have ever seen.

Dreadnought · Post by **Dreadnought** » Tue May 27, 2008 10:26 am

Ok, so Ranger Dreadnought goes with you fuckers on Aussie Bug Safari now:

The Funnel-web Spider

The male ones, chasin' pussy, wander around in summer and fuck you up if you're not careful. The males ones are more toxic than the female ones and the venom is particularly affecting primates. Other mammals are rather resistant.

Here some ugly fuck holding a dead one for size comparison.

Stick Insects

You see them around from time to time. Sooner or later one will fly right in your face and you'll be all WTF because they can get pretty big. In fact the biggest ones around are up to 25 cm.

The Moreton Bay Bug

This rather harmless crustacean tastes really fucking good. You cut them in half, take out the little bit of guts there is (it's incredible how fleshy they are!) and put that on the grill or in batter (you gotta pull out half the meat out of the shell so it 'hangs' out and then batter it) and deep fry it. Or cook them in boiling water and then eat the meat, however I prefer gutting them out first (I don't wanna risk to have lobster ka-ka on my food).
They live around here where I live. The Moreton Bay. Pretty nice here.
Anyway, they fuck around in the mud and eat everything they find. :zoidberg:

entertainer · Post by **entertainer** » Tue May 27, 2008 11:56 am

Dreadnought wrote:

Thor Kaufman · Post by **Thor Kaufman** » Tue May 27, 2008 12:13 pm

:trilobites:

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Tue May 27, 2008 1:06 pm

Dreadnought wrote:

there's zero reason for this guy to exist imho