Duck and Cover

Ever gone to work while under influence of something?
Confess.

Never having worked, I'm afraid to say that the answer is no.

Does school count?

Bleach. I injected it into my veins and ran wild through the crackhouse.

Speed is great at work in most cases. Ketamine is fine if you don't have to do much. Acid can be fun at work if you have at least one other co-worker to fry with, otherwise it can be a little too hectic. E is just a waste of money.
Alcohol is always recommended, although the smell can cause a problem. So drink lots of coffee and chew lots of minty gum.

Best [not] to try by yourself. Being wasted at work isn't fun and might make you lose you job. *ahum*

It is easier to drink at work when you are a manager eh.

And makes problem customers not so difficult.

And being a manager, if a customer complains that you smell like alcohol, who's going to be believed? You or the asshole customer?

So yes, alcohol is my work drug of choice.

What if you worked in a missile silo? (Or, technically a LCC)

You turn a fucking key at the same time as the other guy,
you open a safe to get a codebook.
You reference the wacky "whiskey-tango-alpha-romeo" "challenge-code"
against the response code, or something like that.
And this is only if Sanford finally has a heart attack.
The rest of the time you just sit around and read.

I mean, why not get loaded?
Get a rack of films and drop some hits, etc.

I wish I was in the Air Force sitting on a bunch of missles that are aged far beyond their prime. Hell. I'd launch it out of boredom. Pop goes the Kremlin or whatever.

I suggest sleep deprivation.

I suggest psychosis.

I suggest death.. to you all. Death by hanging from the testicles is good choice.

My opium is all that keeps me going.

hey guys heres my suggestion go to work high on life! thats right i have a nice cup of LIFE (something you addicts probably lack) and i can handle it just fine without any drugs! so go go life and have fun with it! cheers emogrimm

listen gimp mask, if that's even your real name (which I doubt, just fyi), some of us, alright, can understand life but it's, sort of like, enhanced, alright? By drugs that is! So next time you're like, buying your life powder from real-live american store, the employee will be fucked, alright. Like on drugs. What do you think of that huh, or did momma teach you not to think about taking drugs at work. Yeah I thought so little polly, don't talk to strangers, don't cross the road, don't take bullcrap!

This is so emo that I can feel tingling in my pants department.

kashluks are emo?

Just came to work. Put coffee on. little DAC. poke around pillshed. Hmmm.
How do I want to feel today? ANGER. MUTILATION. BUNKER AMOK THORAZINE MURDER. sedatives is the word today. and half the coffee ration.

When I worked in that store I was high all the time.

Now that I'm a white collar my only drugs are coffee and DAC

Ye oldie. That's terrible. Becoming a fonctionnaire I mean.