Star Wars 3

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Sat May 21, 2005 4:03 am

Its a little better than the first two but thats not saying much. It's not a "LUCAS FINALly SCORES AGAIN", its just hyped as such. Oh, and the final battle wasn't very good.

Spazmo · Post by **Spazmo** » Sat May 21, 2005 4:55 am

Some of it was pretty cool, but there were waaaay too many outright laugh out loud moments due to Lucas' unimaginably bad dialog (incidentally jedi never use contractions because it makes them sound MAGICAL). Every scene with Anakin and Padme is accompanied by a soundtrack of laughter from the audience due to the awkward and stupid dialog. Christentsesnetnen (Anakin) just stops acting altogether at the end. And the part where Yoda goes "Not if anything to say about it I have" made me die a little bit.

It is miles better than the other two prequels, but still just an okay movie. I rate it better than Episode I or II, better than either Matrix sequel, better than the Hitchhiker's movie, but probably not any better than any of the original trilogy--maybe RotJ if you really push it.

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Sat May 21, 2005 5:16 am

There was quite a lot of laughter in my theater too. The best parts where when the emporer was being circumsized, padma breaking down and crying all by herself at the snap of a finger, and when yoda was playing ball. There is a lot of other too.

ApTyp · Post by **ApTyp** » Sat May 21, 2005 5:24 am

Mabye ill have a peek
albeit star wars is homo

Trakocian · Post by **Trakocian** » Sat May 21, 2005 8:42 pm

This just in...
Thousands of Nerds, Geeks, and Star Wars Fanatics committ suicide after seeing Episode 3, realizing that their lives no longer hold any meaning.

St. Toxic · Post by **St. Toxic** » Sun May 22, 2005 5:20 am

Didn't like it.
And who the fuck is that guy playing Vader? He didn't become a machine, he was born a fucking machine.
"-Oh. I am so sad. Bip. Now my life hold no ... bzzt.. no meaning."
Terrible acting, the fighting scenes were nothing special, the plot we all knew, the animation held, story limped, a series slaughtered.

Episode 1 was better, because it had Rob Roy MacGregor.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Sun May 22, 2005 7:10 pm

No, because it had Liam Neeson.

St. Toxic · Post by **St. Toxic** » Sun May 22, 2005 7:20 pm

Aka Rob Roy MacGregor.

Post by **DarkUnderlord** » Sun May 22, 2005 10:40 pm

Pfft. Rob Roy was no better.

Slave Mum: There was no father.
Rob Roy: Okay. Ho hum. Doopdedoo. No reaction here that this kid is Jesus and could be the saviour of our kind and bring balance to the Burger Wars, no sirree. Oh look, fifteen minute pod race. Yay.

johnnygothisgun · Post by **johnnygothisgun** » Mon May 23, 2005 2:06 am

You don't sound like a proponent of immaculate conception.

St. Toxic · Post by **St. Toxic** » Mon May 23, 2005 2:35 am

But he had that COPS stare going, and you went "Woah, he's probably the coolest jedi ever!" and then Trainspottin' Renton would go "Duh.. Shouldn't we like kick the door in and eat all the cheese?" and Rob'd be all like "I've been in Nam', and if there's one thing I learned its patience. Read some Dostojeviskij and chillax, alrite mang?"

Jules Winnfield, Fightin' Yoda and the cone-head jedis were boring, acted like as if they were shrinks or something; "So what if they attack? What do you think we should do? What are your feelings about this?"

Rob, on the other hand, was a decisive man, he made every step feel like the obvious decision. Everyone felt secure around him, he was just that smooth.

EDIT: And about the lack of reaction; He did react, he was just very controlled about it. Say you're on a fucked up planet, you just found the messiah, bring balance guy and all that. You're going to shout, throw your light sabre in the air and dance the funky chicken? Hell, that slavechick could be a sith for christs sake, someone could overhear. Before testing his blood he couldn't know that she wasn't full of shit anyhow, shit, you don't just trust anyone about stuff like that.

Mr. Teatime · Post by **Mr. Teatime** » Mon May 23, 2005 8:31 pm

I heard it stands up to the same sort of quality as the original trilogy. Whether that's good or bad, that's a different matter. I might go and see it tommorow, so I'll find out...

Jennifer · Post by **Jennifer** » Tue May 24, 2005 12:08 am

i saw it today. it was pretty decent. not up to the quality of the first three, but unlike the previous prequels it does come pretty close.

my biggest complaint with it was it seemed too crammed full of stuff. it felt like Return of the King almost, seemed like they were trying to stuff a novel's worth of content into two hours, and ended up not spending enough time on any one scene. It felt like a summary of a story, not a story itself. Seemed as though the average scene lasted about a minute at most.

i think i'd have to see it again before i really pass judgement on it though. it had its peaks and valleys. lucas REALLY REALLY REALLY needs to not write his own scripts anymore, though. the dialogue was still pretty atrocious, although the actors delivered it better than they did in ep. 2.

so, lucas can stay on as director, but he needs to sack whoever edited it and get someone who knows how to tell a story, and then hire a good screenwriter. then he'll be gravy.

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Tue May 24, 2005 6:17 am

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of teh Shit
****Ã‚Â½ THE FUNNIEST COMEDY OF THE YEAR -NY Times
*** IT LACKED HOT LESBIAN SEX -Chicago Sun-Times
***** THE BESTEST OF ALL LIVING PICTURES -Entertainment Weekly

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue May 24, 2005 1:52 pm

You started stand-up?

Yeah, Jen. Return of the King did that except for the last scene which last 20 minutes and during which everyone cries

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Tue May 24, 2005 2:52 pm

I was just summing up all the critique this particular movie was receiving. No problemos, yo! At least the movie's worth getting the masses of Star Wars nerds on the run. Triumph made a pretty good job at portraying them in Conan O'Brian: http://www.milkandcookies.com/stuff/triumphvsw.asx

EDIT: Shite. I just noticed that the video takes place in Episode II, not III, premiere.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue May 24, 2005 5:06 pm

Bah, were you still expecting anything from Lucas?

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Tue May 24, 2005 6:01 pm

I finally saw that conan o'brain scene, thank you kasluk. The dog was on a roll.

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Tue May 24, 2005 7:56 pm

Your gratitude is lacking when you can't even spell my internet name right

But sure, you're welcome.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue May 24, 2005 8:57 pm

Does Kashluk actually mean anything?

Duck and Cover

Star Wars 3

jiu-jitsu approved?

Star Wars 3