4too wrote:Be Careful What You Wish For ...
Dreadnought:
Fallout Tournament 2007: The amazing story of Lara Croft.
*optimizm*
Pause and consider that one of the breast known, well , best know game persona's in the art of dual wielding is
http://www.planetlara.com/picview.asp?f ... 2~1024.jpg
Although her latest incarnation has seen a restructuring of her full frontal assets,
deflating many a mammal's fever dreams ,
Lara Croft still has a shot , or two, at the center fold spread as Ms. 'Guns Akimbo' on any given day, of any given year.
As long as time, entropy, and the gravitational pull of competing heavenly bodies does not impede her patented 'lift and separation'.
Please suspend your disbelief, suppose marketing pressures allow a special dispensation on the kosher laws of mixing IP's, allow the mixing of metaphorical icons, allow the mixing of milk and (Dog) Meat on the same plate.
Consider one of the darker traditions of FO. Pop cultural references that can even transcend delusions of Monty Python. Even John Cleese in drag.
Consider Lara Croft abilities and aspirations as another pop cultural reference straddling the twin peaks of pleasing or p-ssing off the play-ahs.
Where 'guns akimbo' ends 'breasts akimbo' begins. Win - win, for a warm / fuzzy and squeezable soft -- SHOCK AND AWE!
Now, any munchkin that has lusted for the god like power and the glory of dual wielding 'pi-stoles' has had to confront the real world gun aficionado's bitch slap about accuracy.
If the Sky Father says NO, then every munchkin knows to go ask the Earth Mother.
Maybe those twin domes do not conceal guidance control radar or enhanced auxiliary synapses, but perhaps the mammary mass can double as shock absorbing modules!
Some sci fi fans enthusiasm might sag here, but some 'play-ahs' F = MA might go logarithmic. Escape trajectory perhaps.
.................
Consider the -- Guns Akimbo Trait -- !
The good news, your physical endowments allow for (Fast Shot) rapid and accurate (aimed) fire when dual wielding (designer) matched hand guns, after your nail polish has dried.
The bad news, your physical endowments prohibit the effective wearing of body armor until they are tailored to accommodate your twin 45's over the shoulder boulder holders. It takes 2 or more suits to couture one ensemble to 'bustier' your armor rating.
You are a sucker for a good back rub and manipulate your unique upper body dynamics to the max by weekly visits to any massage parlor where you happily pay double for chiropractic prestidigitation that looks an a lot like henati pan gender bondage.
The real bitch is, ... if you want to hang like Lara ... that you guys got to grow tits too.
PA life may not be fair, but to dual wield, you got to take the pair!
Men be all you can BE! ..... BOOBIES!
Men when the PA goddess offers lemons, ask for melons!
This is your chance to be, ... the daughter your mother always wanted,
Or, ... the lady boy YOU always wanted.
DUAL wielding?
'Guns akimbo' and 'breasts akimbo'.
Be careful what you wish for!
4too