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Tingel Tangel
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Post by Tingel Tangel »

Subhuman wrote:Dammit, this is DAC. You're not allowed to have a life.

Do post recipes, though.
I know, I'm such a cunt. I have another forum -and- a life. Fucking hell, I don't even deserve to be a member here. Okay, self-bantering over with.

Recipes:
I'm not going to post everything, since a bunch of it was just simple stuff like burgers and such - what, we had to feed more than 100 people with only five cooks: fancy wasn't possible at -all- times - but there are some things that were nice. I'm not going to bother with meassurements, though, since it's individual how much you want of different seasonings and such, and I firmly believe that recipes are only meant to be informal guidelines (omg, sue me!).

At lunch Saturday we, among many other things, served a tuna salad thingy, which is really easy (and cheap) to make:
You use an amount of canned tuna to your own liking, where you've squeased out the water so it's very dry-ish, dump it into a bowl and mix it up with mayo (yes, mayo) untill it gets a texture that's to your preference. Then add sweet corn and season with salt and pepper - that's a base for you, and you can serve it like this, no problem, but to make it a tad more interesting, lemon is your friend. The zest of two lemons as well as the juice of both added to it makes it absolutely great, since it makes it a bit more zingy and actually takes away some of the tuna taste for those who don't like it all too much.

Writing about that reminds me of a similar salmon-salad we made for hour'derves at a similar convention about six months ago.
You buy fileed pieces of salmon - no bones, but with the skin still on, and boil these in water that has salt and pepper in it. The water has to actually look really murky. You wrap the pieces of salmon individually in pieces of baking paper and do your best to seal them off - this prevents it from flaking into the water and giving you a hassle when you have to get it out, though the paper still allows the pieces to be seasoned properly by the salt and pepper - and boil them while wrapped.
When they're done boiling, you unwrap them and put them into a huge bowl where you flake them into tiny pieces. Now you add greek yoghurt (yay, low-fat!) and gently flip it around (not stirring) till it has a sort of fluffly texture. Then you add a bit of spicey mustard and a tad of dill sauce as well as freshly chopped dill as prefered and stir this around to mix it up nicely. If you want it to have a great zing to it as well, the zest and juice of a couple of limes will do wonders (got to love the citrus with the fish.) It was a great heur'derve indeed.
Both salads (or what you'd call them) a served on slices of wheat baguette.

For dinner saturday we did roast beef (no recipe needed here I think) as well as another kind of roast that I wasn't involved in so I wouldn't know the recipe, sadly, and some chicken files:
The chicken was marinated in tomato pure and honey, along with asorted spices: oregano, thyme, rosemary - you catch my drift - and then fried on a pan in oil until cooked halfway to the middle, then to be heated in an oven untill cooked tender. We did the oven thing because we were stressed for space and capacity for so many people, but it's perfectly possible to just fry them on the pan at a low heat instead, if you don't want that much of a hassle.

Also, what we always serve for these things at Sunday lunch is a sort of pizza-buns. In Denmark we have sweet little tea-bun sort of things that can be bought in every grocery store, which we at these assemblies cut in halves and smear with tomato sauce and then add fillings of preference and sprinkle it with cheese - pop into the oven for about 10 minutes (till the cheese is melted) and serve warm. They're delicious little mini-pizzas which go great with hangovers and are hella easy to make for a large amount of people.

Anyway, we made loads of other stuff (breakfast, lunch and dinner would have been sort of bleak if we didn't, huh?) but I either don't have the accurate recipes (or, in my case, list of things we actually used) or don't think it's worthy of posting - but, however, I do want to write a couple of recipes for Catman. I think it was him who asked what to make when the wife was away from home, and I can now add a couple of things I sometimes make for myself, yay!

I was recently at my best friend's house where we cooked dinner for about 10 people because there were quite a few guests. The dinner we made was great and can easily be scaled down for just one person - it does, however, need a bit of time to prepare, so it's not for making if you just want something quick and done with. But if you're really looking for something that tastes awesome and is healthy and so on and so forth and you're actually willing to take the time for it, here it is:

Woked veggies: thin cut potatoes, carrots, mushrooms, broccoli and cauliflower as well as leek and red chillis. Woked in oil with salt, peper and soy sauce.

Cold lettuce and spinach salad with cucumber and mushrooms and cashew nuts and another nut I don't know the name of, dry fried with salt - with homemade dressing made of olive oil, garlic and mustard.

And finally: thin chicken strips marinaded in olive oil, paprika, chilli and garlic.

And, at last, there's a casserole I made some time ago which is a little less healthy but still tasted incredible (unhealthy stuff often does) and was easy to make and also had potatoes in it, so I gather I'll post it since you were off'ing potatoes:

Thinly sliced potates are put in a greased up deep tray along with sliced brocolli and onions. Add pre-fried minced meat, either port or beef but preferably beef - this having been fried with garlic and chopped tomatoes and seasoned with salt, pepper and chilli powder. Mix these things up and pour cream over it (this is where it gets unhealthy) and sprinkle cheese on top and pop it in the oven to stand there untill the cheese is melted and golden and the cream has started boiling up in the sides - that should very well have cooked everything. And voila, lovely casserole.

So, those were my recipes for now. I'm not going to read through the entire thread to check if there are things left unanswered (omg, lazy mod), but I'm back to answer questions now if people wish to ask them. If not, I'll just go back to lurking.
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Subhuman
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Post by Subhuman »

Nice looking recipes, and there's nothing wrong with mayo in a tuna salad - how else would you make it? I like mine with a bit of chopped celery and lots of black pepper, but I'll try that lemon zest tip. Lemon zest seems to make everything tastier.

Okay, advice time. LET'S HEAL SOME BABIES.
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Post by atoga »

Subhuman wrote:Depends on what you want to eat - "Caprese" simply denotes a recipe originating from Capri, or cooked in a Capri style. You've got steak Caprese, pasta Caprese, insalata (salad) Caprese, etc. Speaking of the latter, my personal favorite comes from Tyler Florence, and it illustrates how simple a typical Caprese dish should be in terms of flavor. Most Italian cooking is like that, actually. Take a look around that site and see if some other Caprese recipes float your boat - when it comes to any Italian dish, steer toward something by Florence or Giada De Laurentiis (the booby chick that's almost wholly responsible for the network's male 18-49 demographic). They know their stuff, and I've never had one of their recipes screw up.
i meant insalata caprese, yes. your recipe sounds good, i'll try it out; the other recipes i've found call for too much dressing stuff to be dumped over the tomatoes & boccincini, which i'm not down with. thanx mang. <3

also - from what little experience i have with italians, "caprese" by itself refers to the salad whereas you'd use the full form - pasta caprese, risotto caprese etc. - for referring to anything else. FWIW...

edit: i agree with subby's mayo point, it's pretty much necessary for tuna salad - make your own mayo at home though, it takes like two minutes and is much better than the storebought stuff, which is bloody awful

-báthory erzsébet
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Post by Tingel Tangel »

Subhuman wrote:Nice looking recipes, and there's nothing wrong with mayo in a tuna salad - how else would you make it? I like mine with a bit of chopped celery and lots of black pepper, but I'll try that lemon zest tip. Lemon zest seems to make everything tastier.

Okay, advice time. LET'S HEAL SOME BABIES.
Oi. I never said that mayo in tuna salad was bad - I pointed out that greek yoghurt in salmon salad was good and that cream in the caserolle was fatening. I heart mayo in tuna salad - though Atoga has a point about home made being best. And yeah, lemon or lime makes everything better.

Also: YES, LET'S HEAL SOME BABIES!
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Post by sarge112 »

Recipe time

The Most Disgusting Mix of Drinks (that i know of)

Diet coke
Grape fruitopia
Sunkist OJ
Cheap (this part is crucial) Vodka
Sprite
Something with a cherry flavor

Enjoy!!
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Post by VasikkA »

OK, now for something completely different -- hummus. You know, that paste thing you find in middle eastern food. I've consumed it on some occasions and simply couldn't get enough of it. I found it especially delicious with salads, as well. The ingredients seem pretty simple, but I don't really feel comfortable to try it out myself. It'll probably just be a huge mess. Could you guys share a simple 5-step procedure(or less) for preparing this sinful delight of mine?
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Post by ixg »

off the top of my head, isn't it basically just chickpea puree and lemon
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Subhuman
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Post by Subhuman »

Here's an easy hummus recipe that I can't vouch for taste-wise as I haven't tried it. To make really good hummus it's safe to say that you need to use dried chick peas, which you then soak for 24 hours with some baking soda (to tenderize them), and cook. It's not some kind of purist thing, either - dried chick peas just taste better than canned, and since hummus has so few ingredients and involves no cooking, you need to use the tastiest materials. Tahini is also a required ingredient - you can buy some at the Indian food section of the grocery store.

Anyway, if the recipe above doesn't turn your crank, here's one using dried chick peas and a few more ingredients, including Greek yoghurt. I'm not a huge fan of hummus but this one is pretty awesome.

300g dried chick peas
1 onion, peeled and halved
2 bay leaves
3 cloves garlic, unpeeled
4 cloves garlic, peeled
3 tablespoons olive oil
9 tablespoons tahini
1-2 lemons
pinch cumin
3-5 tablespoons Greek yoghurt

Put the chick peas in a bowl and cover them with cold water. Mix together a teaspoon of baking soda, a tablespoon of salt, a tablespoon of flour, and enough water to make a runny paste. Add this paste to the chick peas, stir, then let the peas soak for a minimum of 12 hours, preferably 24. Drain and rinse the chick peas, then put them in a big pot with tons of water, the unpeeled garlic cloves, the onion, and the bay leaves, and bring to a boil with the lid on. Lower the heat, then cook at a gentle simmer for 1 1/2-2 hours, or until the peas are very, very soft. When finished, save a mugful or so of the cooking liquid, then drain the peas.

Or just open up a can.

Now, the hummus. Dump the chick peas into a food processor, add the 4 peeled cloves of garlic, roughly chopped, a teaspoon of salt, 100ml of the cooking liquid (or water, if you're using canned peas), the olive oil, tahini, juice of 1 lemon, and cumin. Blitz until well pureed. Taste it, adding more liquid if you think it's too thick. Grind in some black pepper, add 3 tablespoons of the Greek yoghurt, and blitz again. Taste to see if you want to add any more lemon juice or yoghurt, or oil, or anything, really. When the mixture is smooth and dense with the taste you like, you're done. Dump into a bowl and have at it.
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Post by PiP »

atoga wrote:also - from what little experience i have with italians, "caprese" by itself refers to the salad whereas you'd use the full form - pasta caprese, risotto caprese etc. - for referring to anything else. FWIW...
yea I think you got that right


sikrit hummus recipe source
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Post by cdoublejj »

cazsim83 wrote:Sweetcheeks. Oddly enough, I've never had a gay man turn me on so much. It happens to be because of the female avatar, but still...it's kind of awkward.
yeah that bitch in the avatar is fucking hot.
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Post by Dreadnought »

Uhm guys... have you seen Subhuman's unhealthy skin and his meek appearance?
Don't trust his recipes! They'll make you sick and skinny.



Oh and:

Jizzim, silence.
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Post by Subhuman »

Can we...muzzle him, or something? Does he have no self-awareness at all? Does he not get how ironic it is for him to make fun of anyone else's appearance, even Megatron's? Does he not recognize what a sad, attention-seeking charity case he his? Why am I even bothering to ask these questions?

Also, my skin has been looking pretty decent lately, which I blame purely on my increased intake in water, more olive oil in my food (seriously, it's great for your skin and hair), and more regular sleep pattern. So nyah.
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Post by Dreadnought »

Subhuman wrote:Can we...muzzle him, or something? Does he have no self-awareness at all? Does he not get how ironic it is for him to make fun of anyone else's appearance, even Megatron's? Does he not recognize what a sad, attention-seeking charity case he his? Why am I even bothering to ask these questions?
It's ironic seeing you talking about irony. And who's seeking attention here with 'Subhuman's advise corner'? Most shit I post is for the sheer waste of bandwith or to fill up 5 mins I haven't planed on anything better. Sure I like a handfull of people here but soon they'll be replaced by robots and everything will be :psychosniper:
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Post by cdoublejj »

Dreadnought wrote:Sure I like a handfull of people here but soon they'll be replaced by robots and everything will be :psychosniper:

Better go get my tin foil hat and shirt made of magnets.
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Post by VasikkA »

Subhuman wrote:food processor
Just what I'm missing. Also, it seems too tedious for something I'd probably fuck up and it'd taste horrible, I'm sure. Thanks for the effort though. I must find a supplier somewhere.

I'll have a go at them muffins this weekend, though.
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Post by jetbaby »

Tingel Tangel wrote:I know, I'm such a cunt. I have another forum -and- a life. Fucking hell, I don't even deserve to be a member here.
Whore.
off topic? OMG YOU'VE BEEN CENSORED... yet you're still posting. MYSTARY!!!!

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Post by Tingel Tangel »

jetbaby wrote:
Tingel Tangel wrote:I know, I'm such a cunt. I have another forum -and- a life. Fucking hell, I don't even deserve to be a member here.
Whore.
I know. Aren't I great?
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Post by Dreadnought »

Tingel Tangel wrote:
jetbaby wrote:
Tingel Tangel wrote:I know, I'm such a cunt. I have another forum -and- a life. Fucking hell, I don't even deserve to be a member here.
Whore.
I know. Aren't I great?
:hahano:
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Post by cazsim83 »

jetbaby wrote:
Tingel Tangel wrote:I know, I'm such a cunt. I have another forum -and- a life. Fucking hell, I don't even deserve to be a member here.
Bitch.
fixed. :drunk:

Nice recipes. It's a lot of work for a lazy bum like me, but it sounds good enough to try.
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Post by Tingel Tangel »

They really don't demand all that work. I mean, the salmon thing does, but that's about it. All the rest of it is easy peasy because it's basically chopping veggies and frying in the right order.
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