A Knight in King Arthur's Cunt

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Megatron
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A Knight in King Arthur's Cunt

Post by Megatron »

Picture this whacky scenario - you have accidentally fallen into a portal that goes back 500 years or whatever. How would you get by?

I would be fucked because:
- I speak modern english not olde worlde langugfe
- I dont actually know how to do anything really
- If my glasses fall off I cant see more than 10ft ahead, also glasses arent invented for another thousand years
- I have a tattoo of the devil

on the other hand:
- I have played Crusader Kings 3

I imagine most of DAC would fare better as everyone is a soldier or has studied Latin at Yale.
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SenisterDenister
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Post by SenisterDenister »

500 years isn't that significant in terms of language. That would be Elizabethan English, like the kind from Shakespeare, which if you understand that you'd understand the spoken language as well. Glasses have also been around since the 13th century, so you'd be alright there, too. Can't help you about the tattoo, though. Now once you start going back further than, say, 1066, you'd be in trouble. Once the Normans conquer England and incorporate French into the language we get Middle English, which is translatable enough into modern English, if you've ever read original transcripts of A Canterbury Tales. Once you start going back earlier than 1066 it becomes a lot more Germanic.

I like studying etymology in my spare time, I always think the history of languages is really interesting. I had a roommate in college who was an Anthropology major who focused on that stuff.

Just by virtue of knowing how to read and write as well as you do you'd probably do well as a courtier to a king or noble somewhere or be a scholar that beats modern philosophies to the punch if you remember anything well enough, or a famous musician.
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Post by Hyacinth »

Yes speaking different languages and knowing how to read should be pretty good start.

I would look up the closest university and have a rocket career introducing people to microbes and shit.

I would probably be axed in a week.
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Post by Amis »

I speak Latin so I think I'd be the king by now.

Alea jacta est.

Edit: I Don't speak Latin, True to kaiser
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Jeff
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Post by Jeff »

Haply we shouldst starteth writing in fusty english simply to practiceth? I don't know how to do anything but that's fine, I think all of us would actually fare pretty well considering how much information we have compared to people of the olden days; you don't need your friggin spectacles when you have 20/20 foresight, just have to pretend to like God so you don't get killed. I think we would pick up on shit that could be improved pretty quickly, like say listen up ese, let's not dump our shit into Thames any more, and you can wash your hands with people fat, I learned this from Fight Club, we meet on Tuesdays in the basement of Lou's Tavern. I know the map of the world, save you some time with this America discovery business. You can use steam to power an engine that does stuff. And stick to the gold standard forever. Things like that. Or you could just write down some Weeknd lyrics and become a great poet, either way no need to be a farmboy
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Post by Megatron »

SenisterDenister wrote:500 years isn't that significant in terms of language. That would be Elizabethan English, like the kind from Shakespeare, which if you understand that you'd understand the spoken language as well. Glasses have also been around since the 13th century, so you'd be alright there, too. Can't help you about the tattoo, though. Now once you start going back further than, say, 1066, you'd be in trouble. Once the Normans conquer England and incorporate French into the language we get Middle English, which is translatable enough into modern English, if you've ever read original transcripts of A Canterbury Tales. Once you start going back earlier than 1066 it becomes a lot more Germanic.

I like studying etymology in my spare time, I always think the history of languages is really interesting. I had a roommate in college who was an Anthropology major who focused on that stuff.

Just by virtue of knowing how to read and write as well as you do you'd probably do well as a courtier to a king or noble somewhere or be a scholar that beats modern philosophies to the punch if you remember anything well enough, or a famous musician.
I think that da linga has changed a bit, even if its just the pronunciations

Image

or even just northern english dialect like:

HE'S just come whoam fuddelt ogen,
An' flung hissel deawn on th' bed;
One's sick o' such low drunken men,
An' aw'm sure there's none worse nor eawr Ned;
For he spends nearly o he con get;
What to do, aw'm as fast as a thief;
Ole th' cubburts an' drawers are "to let,"
An' eawr Jane's gone to ax for relief.

:wtf: :lol:

I'm learning a bit of german so its interesting to see the similarities between languages, but then I imagine the dialects to have been even stronger with no mass communications

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScELaXMCVis&t=20s (old yorkshire dialect) - this guy is good for old/middle english too

I like to think I could be a Science nerd but how to prove stuff like microbes or magnets or something? I could maybe make an electromagnet if I had iron and copper but what would I power be3sides a hand buzzer to give electric shocks to King Fred?
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Post by Hyacinth »

That paper looks like an invitation to a party, or is it a witch burning?

I have a vague memory of a show that I saw as a kid where they traveled back in time and it was all magnetic hovering things Ala matrix and shit.

Also, find a lump of glass from a lightning strike and starrt polishing!
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SenisterDenister
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Post by SenisterDenister »

It's reenactment of a witch burning.
"A rehearsal both strong and true, of heinous and horrible acts, committed by Elizabeth Stile, alias Rockingham, Mother Dutten, Mother Deuell, Mother Margaret, Four notorious Witches, apprehended at Win[d]sor in the County of Barks (Berkshire) and Abbington, arraigned, condemned, and executed on the 26th day of February last 1579."

The writing is different but the actual spoken language is remarkably similar, you'd understand it being spoken more than reading it. They speak it in The VVitch, which is a great movie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-DVhYQjzw8

A lot of people around where I live have an Appalachian accent.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03iwAY4KlIU
Which is pretty interesting, I myself have more of a Piedmont Carolina accent since I'm from Lexington, so they know I'm not native from the mountains.
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Post by Hyacinth »

Yes sounds little bit shakesperian.

https://youtu.be/28DQsoqtbHE

This is the way to talk.



This is what I would have to deal with going back far enough D:

https://youtu.be/lq0aIsiZ44o
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