The School Diary

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Sun Aug 22, 2021 2:12 am

Date: August 22th 2021

Progress: 0 % (0/180 credit)

Rank: Civilian

Situated at: Home

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What if you could go back in time and skip higher education only to wait until you're a middle-aged man to go to the university for the first time? I think that would make for a pretty good movie, American Pie meets 21 Jump Street. But it's not a movie it is in fact real life. My life in fact.

Inspired by Kashluk's Army diary (I never read it so I'm not even sure what it's about), I will write about my experiences here. I will probably drop out but that's all right. Steve Jobs dropped out and how did that work out for him? He died. School starts in a week, ready, set...rock'nroll

In preparation I have done the following:
- bought a note taking app for the ipad
- downloded student card app

The goals I have are as follows:
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmaTiGf5r6A
- Develop an amphetamine habit, it is a vital part of the experience and one of the reasons I applied
- Learn something interesting,
- Make money
- Profit???? /s

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Sun Aug 22, 2021 9:23 am

Congratulations and Enjoy.

Uni is a great place to enjoy good girls gone bad before they go professional.

Do more amfetaminÃ„â„¢ than alcohol and perform on the dance floor.

You will surely break a new path on your life journey.

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Sun Aug 22, 2021 1:26 pm

heres a little university hack: start your essays right now before you have learned anything then do them as soon as your lessons over so you dont end up leaving it til the last minute and hating your course.

uh...is this actually good advice or a joke? I dont know any more buddy.

Introduction
Definitions
Methodology
Research
Synthesis
Conclusion
Mama's Barbecue Cookout

Good luck with your learning journey or however the fuck its branded nowadays. oh hey I dont want to actually accomplish anything its the journey rofl

Souynds good though maybe you will meet other people and you can invitre them to DAC. get some QR codes printed on business cards

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Sun Aug 22, 2021 5:21 pm

slabs

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Tue Aug 24, 2021 8:55 pm

Date: August 24th 2021

Progress: 1 % (2/180 credit)

Rank: Civilian

Situated at: Home

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I've been in a heavily sedated state all day and decided that now would be a good time to take on the "student IT skills" online course that you can/should do before the school starts. It was stuff like a picture of a usb port "what's this mang", and if you should give your password to some guy, a waste of time pretty much and without the tranquilizers my brain would probably have exploded. 1% from 1hr of work is not bad though, at this rate I should graduate next month. I think the best way to do this will be to maximise useless bullshit courses like that

Thanks for the life hacks Megatron I will utilize the IDMRSCM system for sure. In the introduction part should I introduce myself as Gimp Mask, a prolific DAC shitposter? QR codes sound good, maybe I'll tattoo it on my fist, then punch nerdboys in the face until they give me dac gold& upvote my shit

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 11:00 am

I have a home computer and an iPad+pen, do you think I'll make do with the iPad for the portable stuff like lectures and shit if I write proper things on my PC? I could also get a cheap BT keybaord+mouse for the iPad if that helps, it has Office so I could actually write things on it

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 11:46 am

That sounds like freshman shit!

Will you get the powerpoints? Then just sleep in class and play San Andreas on your phone until study time comes around and read the lectures a couple of times!

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 1:54 pm

Sounds good maybe I'll tattoo "fuck school" on my fingers so teacher knows not to mess with me when I'm playing san andreas. Everything will probably be one big Powerpoint because of corona. I could probably do everything from home but I think my life would benefit from a bit of structure.

"Powerpoint is strong with this one" -yoda

j/k

I've been going to one of the university cafeterias already for the cheap food, lots of hot chicks 10-15 years younger than me, I'm lovin' it. The food is pretty good, too

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 4:11 pm

Nice. Have you decided which fraternity you will join or mebbe you should start the ÃŽâ€� ÃŽÂ± ÃŽÂº house.

Solid idea with the tattoos as well. Chicks like mysterious guys,dont forget cool sun glasses and maybe even the ever trendy black leather trench coat.

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 4:50 pm

Hyacinth wrote:Nice. Have you decided which fraternity you will join or mebbe you should start the ÃŽâ€� ÃŽÂ± ÃŽÂº house.

I think I'm a leader not a follower so probably start my own house, the beta dogs, lickin our own balls 24/7 if you know what i mean, hashtag castrated
hella sick (c)2021 gimp mask you can quote me on that but u gotta pay the dues

Solid idea with the tattoos as well. Chicks like mysterious guys,dont forget cool sun glasses and maybe even the ever trendy black leather trench coat.

that's the classic gentleman look ,yes
"the ladies man" they call it

(check out my blogsport for more funny pictures)

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 6:27 pm

the it course sounds good I like to do training with work because they say make sure to do the modules and make sure to wipe your butt then do the test and i just go straight to the test, blam blam blam, like shooting turkey on the 4th of July

we had a guy who took notes on his ipad and also took photos of all the screens but he looked like a bit of a dork always holding it up and squinting at it, I drew a diagram

hth. I think making notes owns

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Wed Aug 25, 2021 6:57 pm

I looked at the picture before reading your post and thought that was a depiction of future me, sheesh maybe I'll just buy a pen and some paper, kick it old school. Maybe not take notes at all kick it pre-school because that guy looks like a deadass jive turkey you dig. I don't want people to know I could be their daddy okay, I am very youthful and hip to da game. Play Station, am I right? for me Dropping Memes is Like shooting turkey in a barrel. 420 am I right? nobody:

Do you think my age will be normal or bizarre, will the children adopt me as their father model, some sort of a paternal bo$$ bitch of the class? Or will I blend in, like a 30 year old american actor cast in a high school drama

"yeah i have a question, can i go to the bathroom lol"

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Wed Sep 01, 2021 10:41 pm

A small update: I am going through the orientation stuff now, it's mostly by Zoom. Signed up to a bunch of courses, skipped live meetings because I wasn't interested in meeting people. Everyone got an online assignment to describe themselves as university students so I drew a picture of a monkey. Then I just kept drawing stuff for most of the day. Got some speed too, feel like I'm ready for this shit

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Thu Sep 02, 2021 10:41 am

Sounds like a valedictorian in the works

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Fri Sep 03, 2021 8:25 pm

so i went to some sort of a after-school hangout gathering, not really my crowd. why people want to talk about school stuff on their free time is beyond me, guess they're more into it than i am, i dunno.

are all university people like this because honestly i would rather get punched i the face. if i do any more of them i'll just show up really fucked up, guess i found another place i don't really fit in. i miss getting pepper sprayed for throwing bananas at taxicabs and shit

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Sat Sep 04, 2021 10:02 am

University world is filled with groomed kids that have been taught that they are the good ones, creme de la creme, for going to university to "become something". it was same at my uni. Smugness and chasing hierarchical structures. Bubbles of people who echo the correct opinions and share the uninteresting similar bland ideas.

Generally the more trauma an individual has been the more interesting they get.

Seek out the drug users, they are the fun ones, just don't get caught up in it.

SenisterDenister · Post by **SenisterDenister** » Mon Sep 06, 2021 8:04 am

I wouldn't say trauma, just more life experience. Those aren't mutually exclusive, but trauma can also make people strange in a bad way, not interesting.

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Fri Sep 17, 2021 7:18 pm

Date: September 17th 2021

Progress: 2 % (3/180 credit)

Rank: Student

Situated at: Home

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2nd week of studies is now over. Not a whole lot to report thus far. I'm slowly getting the hang of things, although studying itself is pretty difficult as I haven't really been to school to study in 15 years. It's tough to get off your ass and put in the work, and I'm a slow reader to boot. Not very good with the whole academic thing either. Help me DAC

On the other hand I'm starting to figure out which subjects interest me the most which is nice, and writing and talking about the texts we've read is pretty useful, very different from just reading a bunch of shit on your own. I'm actually feeling pretty enthusiastic about the whole thing for now, so that's pretty cool. I feel like I'm probably going to prioritize the interesting stuff and just try to pass the rest, I don't really care about the grades and all that but would be nice to pass

Been a while since I had to hang out with a bunch of unknown people, forgot how terrible I am with group dynamics, that's fine, I'm not here to make friends, only enemies. I'm probably the dumbest of the lot which is the optimal situation as far as learning is concerned. Getting nosebleeds from the speed, I'll have to try to remember to rinse my nostrils and oil them up. Most of the lectures are on Zoom which kinda sucks but that was to be expected. It's annoying/funny how some of the teachers don't know how to use PowerPoint when it's pretty much all they need to know to use during the lectures. Also I got 3 credit from doing useless mandatory IT basic bullshit courses

The other students are cool, nothing bad to say about them really

Hyacinth · Post by **Hyacinth** » Fri Sep 17, 2021 10:58 pm

Sounds like good academic progress

The acclimatization to just reading something forced upon you takes a little while, but as you are noticing when you start to have a momentum it goes easier. Just don't loose the momentum.

Grades are completely irrelevant. The only thing that matters is to pass. Studying is a grind.

There are tons of study techniques, ignore them, don't procrastinate chasing for a short cut. Don't loose momentum in reading.

Have something like a lamp that you turn on only when you are studying. It makes the transition easier for your brain to get into focus on reading.

Drink lots of water. Piss often, like a mini-break.

Stop studying when your mind starts to wander. Take 15 minutes break but don't get caught up with procrastinating.

Meditate and sleep. Speed burns you out.

Jeff · Post by **Jeff** » Sat Sep 18, 2021 10:38 am

That's all very good advice, thanks Hyacinth

Taking breaks when the mind starts wandering: this I've been doing already and it's very helpful

Meditate and sleep. Speed burns you out.

speed makes me sleepy