Duck and Cover

Domo arigato Blargh san.

I'd suggest sama instead of san

WINGSUIT.

The engine seems efficiently optimised, haven't had any crashes (so far), and the game looks very nice, even on less than maximum settings.

Impressive sound architecture. Particularly noticable when you're spelunking in a cave after some musty statue and a skirmish begins above.

The vehicles handle nicely, with character. Unlike Far Cry 2 where everything was a brick. Not that I've been using vehicles much, though.

The firearm mechanics are fine, they don't employ that deplorable every-bullet-you-fire-goes-in-a-cone mechanic, they sound satisfyingly ballistic, they kill things, there's a reasonably varied selection. Well placed shots put most opponents down quickly, unless they're a tiger. Tigers are best tackled with explosives.

The compound bow is the best weapon in the game (after the flamethrower), and, once you become used to its quirks, a lot of fun. By virtue of its respect for gravity and flight time (though not wind speed/direction ?), it becomes wonderfully cathartic to reliably put an arrow through a pirate at 100+ metres. Also, they come in incendiary and explosive flavours.

The fast travel system is quite good. You unlock more destinations with each outpost conquered. That said, I rarely make use of it, as it involves skipping all sorts of emergent bollocks that is, mostly, very entertaining. Mostly involving tigers.

The animal AI is rather good. Tigers and leopards are sneaky fucking bastards. Komodo dragons are persistent fucking bastards. Packs of rabid dogs are irritating fucking bastards. Cassowaries are terrifying fucking bastards. Sharks, crocodiles and giant squid make every foray into the water a unique and wholesome experience. Being ambushed <strike>at all</strike> while you reconnoitre a base is great fun, and a reminder of why all the (now extinct and barely remembered) tourists found the islands so captivating.

Mostly decent voice acting.

Fire propagation. It's back, and it's just as <strike>dangerous</strike> much fun as it was in Far Cry 2. While rainforests and jungles aren't quite as flammable as parched African savannah, it's still easy to thoroughly encircle an enemy camp before announcing yourself (or not).

The main missions have been entertaining, so far. Though, I confess, I haven't been focusing on them. Mostly I've been exploring, drowning, getting Jason's legs chewed off by crocodiles, and collecting relics/letters/memory cards (because they give you shiny new weapons).

You can purchase maps, which is a nice concession to the OCD amongst us. Finding all the gubbins would take a very long time without them.

Some not so fantastic stuff, naturally, in no particular order :

The . . . plot, such as it is, is the usual puerile, boilerplate power fantasy. Maybe. With, depending upon how much one indulges in <strike>OVER THINKING</strike> basic observation, a fairly heavy handed attack on the player, rather than the player character. YOU ENJOYED BRUTALLY MURDERING THOSE PIRATES IN NUMEROUS HEINOUS WAYS, DIDN'T YOU, DON'T DENY IT. YOU MONSTER. AND STOP MASTURBATING.

Or, perhaps it's the other way around and the NPCs are responding in a reasonable manner to the protagonist going completely bugfuck.

Nevermind that your only options in this game are, naturally : <strike>commit war atrocities</strike> genocide the universally hostile pirates/tigers/marmosets et al, or stop playing. Much like Spec Ops - The Line. Very War Games.

Or, it could be a metaphor for neocolonialism. Or, it could just be stupid.

Vaas is probably the most well realised (also, arguably, the most developed) character in the game (so far). It's almost a shame to kill him, really. Much more interesting than the player avatar, Jason Brody - who transitions from conspicuously privileged, (rightfully) terrified post university world traveller to hyper competent man (and beast) shooter (and stabber) from the moment you pick up your first gun and dispense with conscience and remorse. It's midly jarring, to say the least.

Stealth is really easy. You hide in shrubs, you throw rocks to distract people/convince them to look away, then you sneak past, sneak up and stab them etc. Or, occasionally, they spot you from 300 metres and then everyone in the area rushes you. No middle ground with telepathic pirates.

The side quests are your standard murderous gopher fare - go there, kill a thing, go somewhere else, find a thing, bring it back, receive some cash and experience (both of which are trivial to earn through the usual run around and kill/loot things approach). Also, various time trial/checkpoint races, timed shooting galleries. Even poker. After trying a few, I decided against bothering with the rest. Suffered one, suffered them all.

The human AI isn't amazing, most patrols (though they are quite frequent before you neutralise the closest outpost - which do not respawn) consist of two on foot or two in a vehicle, and they're easily foiled by such complicated techniques as : throw a rock and approach (and eviscerate) them while they investigate it/shoot them in the face with a rifle from 500 metres/set them (and all the plants within 100 metres) on fire/lure them into the path of the numerous predatory (oportunistic and often, extremely tenacious) creatures/place a mine/C4 in their path, to mention just five.

It might just be me, but each time you topple an outpost and your (always late) cavalry of militant natives arrives, and they stand around posturing, taking credit for your work, and suggesting that you consider doing something real, something challenging, something helpful (and check out the bulletin board), I want to kill them. Alas, they are allies. I AM A BETTER YOU THAN YOU BECAUSE I DO THINGS WHEREAS YOU PRETEND TO DO THE THINGS THAT I HAVE DONE. Very Dancing with Wolves/The Last Samurai/Avatar.

Or, perhaps they're just cunningly exploiting his desire to find/save his friends/avenge his dead brother. :onionsallthewaydown:

What is it with games and static worlds where only the protagonist ever does anything (while the NPCs mostly act only when you're not there/looking) ? It's grating.

The skill system. Setting aside my distaste for the <strike>tattoo</strike> tatau aesthetic (would have preferred something inspired by traditional pacific islander styles to the modern 'tribal' tripe), access to the skills is tied to completion of main missions. I suspect this means that by the time one can purchase the most advanced options, there won't be much of the game left, aside from aimless post game wandering. Hopefully a newgame+ mode will be modded in, at some point.

Certain weapon mods, particularly the 'optical scopes' for assault rifles were almost impossible for me to use with any accuracy, due to the reticle being blindingly bright, and obscuring targets. Superior nocturnal illumination. Ha. I was unable to fix this, despite tinkering extensively with the settings. On the subject of weapon modification, the entire first tier of weapons offers no such options. No idea why. Would have enjoyed a 'tactilol'd' AK.

Quick time events.

The UI is fond of popping up to ask you why you haven't moved on to the next mission/objective yet, every few minutes, without fail. Can't be toggled, far as I can tell. Odd choice for a predominantly open world game. Reminds me of the character of Fiona from Mercenaries 2 - World in Flames, in text form. Fiona, for the mercifully ignorant, would badger the player incessantly with her irritatingly chipper faux Australian accent every minute or so to inform you for the fifteenth time about how the bridge you just levelled (also for the fifteenth time) was named for a local general, or to ask if you were lost. So, not quite as bad, but still fairly awful.

Checkpoint saving only.

UN-SKIPPABLE BLOODY CUTSCENES.

Cutscene idiocy, in numerous flavours. Gods.

Often recycled first-aid animations. I once fell from a cliff (and almost died) and reset my thumb, then later, was shot (almost died), and reset my thumb, still later, a grenade landed nearby, spraying me with shrapnel (almost died), and I reset my thumb. Also, the mystery of the invisible bandages upon invisible bandages upon invisible bandages.

Unforgiving falling damage. You can die from falling three metres. Yes, I know you can die from falling (just so) three metres in meatspace, BUT THIS IS A GAME.

Uplay. Which can be gated through Steam. Which can, in turn, be gated through Origin. Hilarious.

Crafting. Apparently you can only make a larger wallet out of dingos (it may have been komodo dragons, or vultures, the point endures). Who knew ! I realise it's to encourage exploration, but it's fucking tedious, nonetheless. I have six deer skins in my pocket, but that more spacious quiver I have my eye on will only deign to be formed from the finest bear pelts ? As Mussolini was known to sometimes say : Pshaw.

You can only have two syringes mapped to hot keys at a time. It even has the image of a d-pad on the 'assign to slot' screen. The other two prongs are, inexplicably, reserved for the camera (which functions as binoculars and allows target marking) and for rocks (which, as mentioned, are for throwing). These two 'free' slots are also used for the aforementioned craftable specialty arrows. Blame consoles ?

Further, with the exception of the medical syringe, all other syringe effects are exclusive. No stacking at all. Clearly, augmenting one's lung capacity while enjoying the benefits of shark repellent is just too much to ask for.

The multiplayer (which I've yet to try) appears to be a linear, 4 player co-op, scenario based affair. Quite the departure ! Not sure I'll bother, to be frank.

<strike>It might seem that</strike> I've whinged a fair bit, as usual. Despite my grievances of varying severity, I am having a great deal of fun with this game, while recognising its flaws.

Might have further musings at some point, might not. Woo.

Blargh you can shoot those Rakyat fags cause i do because one they suck, two they are weaker then pirates, and three they dont wear shoes.

Yeah, I've justified it by virtue of Jason's obvious metal collapse. They clearly wanted a broken, homicidal maniac with an increasingly tenuous regard for reality. Expecting such a person not to snap and kill them for little/no reason would be remarkably naïve. It's a shame that they never upgrade their kit, or wear armour. Shitty AKs and bad shirts for everyone.

Which leads into another thing I've become painfully aware of : the lack of 'bark' variety. Almost as bad as (what I've seen on youtube of) Skyrim. Perhaps the developers were slyly courting memetic status ? I USED TO BE THE AVATAR OF A WARRIOR GOD UNTIL A TIGER -

Either way, it's an indefensible misstep with an open world game.

Also, a clever soul fixed that scope issue I mentioned. They're usable now, which is nice.

I feel that I should amend a previous comment : Buck is every so slightly a better character than Vaas. It's a combination of great voice acting and impressive motion capture/emoting. It's a close thing, but Buck was just so . . . affable.

Would be nice if incendiary arrows actually set people on fire. Because as far as I can tell, they don't. Explosive arrows are wonderful, though. Like a teleporting grenade.

Apparently the obnoxious UI can only be tweaked through hex editing ? Further proof the game was made by tigers.

Boss battle QTEs. I know that thematically they can be hand waved on account of Jason's frequent exposure to powerful hallucinogens/psychosis et al, but it does not excuse the fact that as gameplay they are terrible.

WINGSUIT is pretty cool. Except when you leap from the side of a hill and hit the ground as you engage the flaps. Because clearly in that brief moment you were moving with sufficient velocity to necessitate an immediate and messy demise.

Ahahaha, the cutscene after inhuming the giant at the temple. Wow. Just wow.

Metro 2033 sucks, uninstalling now.

What is this word... uh, how u say, uninstall?

My NV, again. *sigh*

:canadian:

So, apparently, Hoyt (who isn't a very compelling villain on account of insufficient presence, for the most part) is a Templar - that is, Far Cry exists in the same universe as Assassin's Creed. How very Shyamalanesque.

Similarly, the whole ending sequence, I refer specifically to the CLUMSILY FORESHADOWED last minute SURPRISE KIDNAPPING of the INANE FRIENDS by the DRUG FUCKED TRIBAL CULTISTS, and the impressively nuanced Moral Choice it prompted. . .

Absolutely fucking hilarious.

Might play again in a few months, <strike>after</strike> if some decent mods are released. Was entertaining while it lasted.

Red Barons sticky flipping jamming incineration rounds. It's the reason they did not give their pilots parachutes. It's the reason they did not send their aces against huge flying ships (Asia). They are not designed to set things alight Blargh san, because of dope and gun powder not white phosphorous and metallic clanging.

*spoilers below*














































































It's also the canadian that took down the German ace, and because of canvas as well

That's fascinating.

However, the incendiary arrow in Jason Brody Becomes Fucked in the Head 3 is basically a molotov taped to a pointy stick. It's even in the recipe : one arrow, one molotov. When fired, it bursts into a brief (and relatively small) conflagration of rum (?) and fire (!) on impact, which causes the stupid bastard on the recieving end to flinch, stagger, and return to trying to kill you while yelling about his terrible case of crabs within a few seconds, essentially none the worse for wear.

It's mildly perplexing for several reasons. Firstly, the molotov itself is a highly effective method of inducing the burny dance, provided you strike your target directly. Secondly, I can only conclude that, between the falling damage model, and the fact that he dies within moments of being set on fire, Jason must have a balsa wood skeleton. Thirdly, somehow, the arrow itself vanishes, when it should be embedded in their forebrain, sternum or elbow, burning gloriously.

And fuck those staggeringly drunk bastards with their implausibly perfect grasp of physics and unerring aim. On the other hand, it does make shooting their bandoliers of molotovs all the sweeter, because they know how to dance.

Here's a combined mod of the sights mod I linked earlier, plus attachments for all weapons. The attachment system was emancipated by a fellow who goes by the name of gibbed. He's fairly prolific with the modding.

Hello, my name is STEAM GUAGE ASSEMPLY. I'm drunk and confused, also useless.

CONGRATULATIONS... YOU GET A GOLD STAR.

You assholes come and play World of Tank, it's free to play.

Ahahaha, (I only just noticed on account of playing almost exclusively with bow, knife and grenades) Far Cry 3 has fallen into the bullets-from-certain-firearms-magically-vanish-after-a-certain-distance hole. Case in point, approximately 250 metres for the obligatory .50 sniper cannon. How serendipitous that it appears to be on the radar of the modders. In fact . . .

Non-non sequituresquely : this mod addresses the baffling climb a tower, receive free gear design choice. Woo.

And they're fairly easy to re-combine, too.

thanks to mods i finally have a suppressed AK but i prefer the jew AK to the ruskie one.

Too bad AR bullets break the sound barrier.

Birds of Steel (yes another ps3 game)...Closest thing to a simulator I've seen on a console.

So, Far Cry 3's main writer has gone all Garth Marenghi. Pretty bloody hilarious.

Hitman - Absolution isn't anywhere near as awful as I had suspected. Note, it's still quite awful. A bucket of awful, rather than a lake of awful.

So the War Z fallout is spectacularly hilarious.

Since its original announcement everyone I know has said it was a scam, myself included.

And people are actually surprised when they find out it is a scam.

My jolly belly is rumbling through space and time.

Hehe. War Z. The shit got so bad Valve took it off Steam and issued an apology today.

The whole thing was like watching two trains collide, knew exactly what was going to happen but I couldn't stop myself from watching it go down anyway.

Sergei, or whoever the lead dev was, is such an ass it made the whole thing a blast. Never knew what he was going to pull from his ass next. "We're not lying, our customers just don't know how to read" he would say in his garbled English.

Oh man, I haven't laughed this hard in a while. People are so stupid.

What's that story?