GIRLS

Naked_Lunch · Post by **Naked_Lunch** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 6:59 pm

Susan's GF is actually a man.

Koki · Post by **Koki** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:03 pm

Read further, friend Blargh. You should not take a half whilst leaving rest to it's fate. Eat it all, and quickly

Aonaran · Post by **Aonaran** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:17 pm

Kashluk wrote:Well, you know what they say... You gotta try everything, except your momma

I made love to my mother, killed my father and my brother...what am I to do?

baby arm · Post by **baby arm** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:19 pm

ride the snake

Naked_Lunch · Post by **Naked_Lunch** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:32 pm

My girlfriend wants to have a threesome with some guy I don't know what should I do I'm new at this!

baby arm · Post by **baby arm** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:42 pm

Have sex with the guy first so you can figure out each other's timing and rhythms. That way, the threesome won't be so awkward later. Also, wear Ronald Reagan masks.

Aonaran · Post by **Aonaran** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 7:51 pm

Naked_Lunch wrote:My girlfriend wants to have a threesome with some guy I don't know what should I do I'm new at this!

Hit her.

Naked_Lunch · Post by **Naked_Lunch** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:01 pm

i don't want to hit her because she's the one and only i love and i don;'t know what t o tell her becaue Im afraid she;ll get mad and my soulmate wil lwalk away from me, leaving me a battered hsell of a man who once was

Aonaran · Post by **Aonaran** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:03 pm

Soulmates dig DP.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:12 pm

baby arm wrote:ride the snake

That was an awesome sketch.

"Do you know what? Not only did I lose 50 pounds in a week, but I also discovered that I am the DEVIL!!!"

Aonaran · Post by **Aonaran** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:14 pm

Upright Citizens?

baby arm · Post by **baby arm** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:32 pm

I was refering to "The End" by the Doors (mom fucking & dad killing being an integral part to that song). But yeah, that SNL sketch is awesome and probably the only funny thing I've seen Jim Carey do.

Geno · Post by **Geno** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 8:55 pm

Aonaran wrote:I made love to my mother, killed my father and my brother...what am I to do?

Blind yourself by forcing her brooch pins into your eyes. Then give your kingdom to your two sons who will then kill each other.

Oedipus style!

If you want a girlfriend, the first thing to do is go out and meet people.

VasikkA · Post by **VasikkA** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 9:57 pm

Geno wrote:If you want a girlfriend, the first thing to do is go out and meet people.

Go out? It's the 21st century damnit, get on with the times. You can meet people on AIM or MSN or myspace or whatever the fuck you prefer, but going out costs money and damages your liver and that aint cheap, son. Are you saying we must compromise our financial stability and health in order to perhaps find a soul mate that in the end fucks you up and leaves you with 50% of your possessions? This is all you need.

Naked_Lunch · Post by **Naked_Lunch** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:02 pm

but u might meet ur soulmate like i did u guys are cool u should be so lucky

Blargh · Post by **Blargh** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:30 pm

Koki wrote:Read further, friend Blargh.

UnNECESSARY.

Reason : Selective non-sight. Blessing !

PiP · Post by **PiP** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 11:21 pm

S4ur0n27 wrote: Apparently women just don't have the same appetite for sex as men.

Koki wrote:A matter of choice, really.

right

Blargh wrote:
Koki wrote:I actually slightly regret not ever having a g/f
I wouldn't. Though that is, perhaps, a symptom of personal experience(s) and (mis)adventure(s).

I feel sorry for you. No, this isn't ironic or spiteful, it's genuine sympathy.

baby arm wrote:that SNL sketch is awesome and probably the only funny thing I've seen Jim Carey do.

what are you talking about?

Stainless · Post by **Stainless** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 11:38 pm

I've had a couple of g/fs, but they have a tendancy to explode. Last two cheated on me, one before that one kind of just vanished. I think after another couple of these incidents I'll start to think it's my fault.

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Tue Jan 17, 2006 11:58 pm

I forgot to mention that by GIRLs i mean hot ones not the apes that susan fucks. Anyone can get some emo goth and have sex with her.

Blargh · Post by **Blargh** » Wed Jan 18, 2006 12:03 am

PiP wrote:I feel sorry for you.

How nice.

However, were that sympathy understanding born of the impossibility of identical experience, something resembling empathy, I'm reasonably certain you would not feel as you apparently do.

Similar just does not do.

I do, however, feel woefully gypped by your cruel withholding of pointed contrast and malice. Nonetheless, I find some amusement in your maintenance of moniker.

It could be better, it could be worse.