Gamespy wants: Auto Assault

Jinxed · Post by **Jinxed** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 2:49 pm

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There's a short <a href="http://mostwanted.gamespy.com/2005/pc/2 ... article</a> on <a href="http://mostwanted.gamespy.com/2005/">Gamespy's most wanted of 2005</a> about a post apoc MMO game called Auto Assault.
 <blockquote> Auto Assault takes place in a post-apocalyptic wasteland where aliens in the process of terraforming the Earth have left behind a world we'd barely recognize (unless, of course, you've ever seen The Road Warrior). Driving around the ruins of the Earth, players will have access to a variety of souped-up killer cars with which they'll fight off aliens, mutated monsters, robots and, of course, other players. They'll have to do this in order to compete for raw material, minerals, food, and the greatest prize in this future world -- a full tank of gas.</blockquote>One thing's for sure, it sounds good on paper. (minus the alien part that is, but I guess that's part of the story, no matter how cheesy it may sound) <br More info about Auto Assault can be found on the <a href="http://www.autoassault.com/">official site.</a>

Janus Matchell · Post by **Janus Matchell** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 3:51 am

So has anyone here seen Tron? The motorcycle looks like one of them there motorcycles.

Mismatch · Post by **Mismatch** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 11:22 am

Janus Matchell wrote:So has anyone here seen Tron?

Everyone mustve seen tron, its a masterpiece.
With effect too good for its age. Ive got 20th annerversary edition is really really cheap on da VD

4too · Post by **4too** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 4:17 pm

Bait And Switch

Sample of the "copy", a crafted lure for the swimming schools of cyber eyes.

Do you love the smell of radioactive mutant fusion bombs in the morning? Do you enjoy the company of oversized, toxic, hungry xenomorphs? Did you ever wish that the world would just come to a crashing apocalyptic end, after which heavily armored, tricked out combat vehicles were the only means of survival?

Again.

... Did you ever wish that the world would just come to a crashing apocalyptic end, after which ...

Some may wish that in the Post Apocalypse, there will be little time, pity, or mercy for Massive Online, scoot, shoot, and loot, entertainment vehicles.

Outside of FO:BOS , this strip joint barker's 'come on' is not the cinematic "vision" one might hope to encounter in a Post Apocalyptic trailing after the FO dramatic tradition. More like trolling for 'phish".

Nor is it an evangelical's, Book of Revelations, teeth gnashing, wail of lost redemption. Still. With effort, one could squeeze even a -- smell -- of "morality play'
out of this Vision Of The Future, ... , and black hole for monthly subscription fees.

'Auto Assault' appears to be a pay to play sand box. A theme arena of consenting competition. Perhaps there is 'hope' in the ""thrill of victory and the 'agony' of competition"" . The "good' natured inter species rivalry may be a crushingly creative social venting of modern angst. With 'hope' one might pontificate that this ""hell on earth"" might be a step
on the stairway to more 'morally responsible' self entertainment, and not just another sexploitation shell game.

Bait And Switch.

A more knowledgeable (b)ass master might know exactly what hooks are lurking in this bend of the old muddy river that is ""Massive On Line Misogyny".

This wall paper was labeled ""Mission Complete".

At the visual center is this:

http://www.autoassault.com/recon/images/recon_jen.jpg

So the 'kings of the hill' will camp at the spawning points, loot knobby desert tires, and Big F'ing Guns, all to monopolize a petrochemical energy source that requires an extensive social, industrial and marketing infrastructure.

In this Mad Max Wanna Bee, fantasy land, this "alternated state", pumping up hormone induced deviations in the mundane laws of chemistry and physics: ---- We are seduced to suspend our disbelief for the unlimited 'shelf life' of gasoline and the gravity defying suspension of the - mammary - endowments of the eye candy reward in the "Mission Complete" wallpaper.

So, out side of the eye candy, this game has no sirens' call for me.

Those that will flock to Gamespy's commercial enthusiasm of the E-3 demo,

""we salute you"".

Please return to bitch slap me, when this Post Apocalyptic 'self' fulfillment franchise, ... , satisfies, ALL your entertainment needs.

This procurer named 'Auto Assault'.

4too

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 9:03 pm

*applauds*

I still don't understand shit what you're talking about, but it sure sounds very respectable.

Insane-Lark · Post by **Insane-Lark** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 9:25 pm

It made sense to me & I suggest you read it in segments Kash. As far as Auto Assault goes, it looks like crap. Gamespy can rave about it until the apocalypse & fail to hook this wench.

Blargh · Post by **Blargh** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 9:49 pm

Kashluk wrote:I still don't understand shit what you're talking about, but it sure sounds very respectable.

Not meaning to be offensive exactly, but :

why the fuck then, do you

Kashluk wrote:*applauds*

?

As you've indicated you 'don't understand shit' about 4too's comment, what is there to remark upon ? What is the point of your response ?

If you carry that sort of mentality over to other, more important things - voting for example - I humbly suggest you just stay home for the rest of your life, and sever all contact with others. We're thinking of your safety. Okay ? Okay.

Again, no offense meant (which is hilarious, really, as that is almost always a prelude to something potentially offensive). Sincere as the smile of a killer.

Lots of love,
Blargh

P.S - If the nature of the attached comment was a fluke, ponder potentials.

P.P.S - Asparagus.

---

Auto Assault looks like shite. Woo yay. Another one. One less potential trend breaker. I am distraught.