The Expendables - advance review

[King of Creation]

The most epic movie to be made this century is doing advanced screenings, and I found this review on AICN http://www.aintitcool.com/node/43947 :

Hey Mr. Harry,

Ever heard of a little movie called THE EXPENDABLES?!?!

Well, I did, and I swore I would never return to Chatsworth unless I had a good enough reason... Last night, Sly gave me 7 -- Rourke, Crews, Couture, Stallone, Statham, Li, Lundgren!!!!

These are the guys who make up The Expendables, a group of merceneraries hired to overthrow an evil dictator (David Zayas from Dexter) and his crew of thugs (Eric Roberts, Steve Austin and assorted soldiers in black face paint).

If the plot sounds simple to you -- it is. You walk into a movie like this expecting to see ACTION and CAST, and I have to say, I saw some of the most famous action stars of our time sharing the screen and killing baddies in ways I never even knew possible.

Here are my thoughts on the film. I've never posted anything like this before, but I've only ever been to completely shitty advance screenings before (LAND OF THE LOST anyone?).

THE CAST:

We all knew this film had the greatest action stars of all time in one film together, but I was worried coming in that there wouldn't be enough screen time / dialogue to make the film feel meaty...

Safe to say, Stallone has written a script that gives plenty of bits to every Expendable. Obviously, Statham is the winner here as the knife expert. His character (the badass with a heart) is played perfectly and his fight scenes are absolutely amazing. Trust me, you will look at knives with a newfound respect.

My second fave was Mickey Rourke, the tattoo artist of the gang, who acts as the wise sage throughout the film (think: The Wrestler but with guns instead of elbow drops).

Jet Li definitely has the comedy throughout the film, playing "the little guy" as he shows everyone what's what... Lundgren was a bit of a miss for me, but only because I couldn't understand half the stuff he was saying. Terry Crews and Randy Couture both fill in their roles excellently (esp Crews, the ammunitions expert, with his magic bullets).

Stallone -- He's in virtually every scene as the ringleader, but I was impressed by how he kind of hangs back and lets all of these other great action stars play out their roles.

As for the bad guys, obviously Eric Roberts is pitch-perfect evil incarnate. He was born to play a bad guy. Steve Austin is a solid block of beast. (There's a fight scene in a tunnel at the end of the movie where he just Won't Go Down.) David Zayas from Dexter surprised me as the dictator, although I could've done without the beret.

I think the biggest news, aside from all of these BIG NAMES, were 2 guys that I didn't even know were fully confirmed for The Expendables -- ARNOLD (The Governator) and BRUCE WILLIS. They have a hilarious scene together that's very tongue in cheek. I'm really surprised Arnold was in this and said the things he said. (I won't spoil the dialogue.) It just made the entire film come together in a really unique way.

THE ACTION:

Aside from THE CAST, blood is what we came to see, am I right?? Having seen all of the Rambos and really admired Rambo 4, I would label the action as a throwback to the vintage 80s actions movies we all know and loved (First Blood comes to mind).

Obviously, Sly is no James Cameron – and he doesn’t care to be. This isn’t a film you watch with 3-D glasses on. This is a throwback to the pre-special effects days and I found that jarring at first – What, a movie with no blue people?! – but as the film went on, I was cheering and pumping my fists with the rest of the crowd.

As for specific scenes, there are a number of memorable ones that I’m sure we’ll be dissecting for ages – Statham on the basketball court, the explosion on the dock, the tunnel fight and especially the extended climax at the end (where nothing and no one is left standing).

At the end of the day, I really admire what Sly has done here. He’s always had this ability to write strong character-driven stories. What makes The Expendables unique is that there are at least 10 compelling characters to follow… Here’s hoping there’s a sequel!

Signing off,

PewPewPew

[Connor]

I've been excited for this movie ever since it was announced.

[Aonaran]

Still waiting on Rambo vs. Mexican Cartels vs. Border Patrol vs. Coyotes aka Rambo V. Oh, and that movie where Stallone plays Rambo but with a different name and fights a wolf-soldier with a son-figure that isn't his son.

You know the one I'm talking about.

[S4ur0n27]

I do.

[King of Creation]

Still waiting on Rambo vs. Mexican Cartels vs. Border Patrol vs. Coyotes aka Rambo V. Oh, and that movie where Stallone plays Rambo but with a different name and fights a wolf-soldier with a son-figure that isn't his son.

You know the one I'm talking about.

Indeed. I can't believe that they actually considered that as a plot for the next Rambo movie.

Rambo v. El Chupacabra!