Duck and Cover

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https://play.aidungeon.io/main/scenario ... o%3A458612



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Paste what comes out in this thread.

I am a DACKER, yes I am. I look so fucking good. I am riding on a dry and old horse, it is well over it's natural life expectancy but I will not allow it to die. I am searching for other dackers which are out there, somewhere.

You look at the woman who has been staring back at you all this time. She looks like she is about to cry.

> You slap the woman.
You stand up from your seat and walk towards the woman. The woman turns her head away in fear as you grab her by the arm and begin to pull her back towards you.

> You say "Tingeltangel, is that you? What are you doing here? "
"Tingeltangel?" the woman says.
"Yes, that is my name."
"I am so happy that you recognize me... so do you remember what happened on that night?"
"Perfectly."

> You say "Where are the others? "
"One of the men shot the other one dead for... well I don't know what reason, then he shot Tom in the back of the head, but he did not die."
"Who are you? "

> You say "I am the oracle, from ancient past, you dummy. "
"Oh, you're the oracle."
"Yes, I am."
"I don't know what you want me to do, Tingeltangel.

> You say "Is there an echo or am I hearing voices in my head? "
"Ha ha, oh how I've missed your sense of humor. Tell me, are you still in pain?"
"Pain? Yes, but now it's gone.

> You say "Stop putting words in my mouth. "
"You want something? Ask me a question."
"How do I how to get out of here?"

> You say "Am I asking that? "
"You think you are in a maze? But you are not."
"What do you mean?

> You slap tingeltangel.
"Ow! No, no don't do that."
"Was that a question?"

> You say "Who the hell is Tom and why isn't he dead? "
"The man you see before you is called Tom."
"Why isn't he dead?"
"Because he refused to talk to us, that's why."
"To who?"
"To us.

> You grab the bottle of bensodiazepam from your pocket, pop the lid and chug 3 capsules.
Tom looks at you before smiling.
"Take as many as you like, they are not working anyway."

> You slap Tom.
"Ow! !"
"Who the hell is Tom and why isn't he dead?"
"Tom is a man who has been arrested many times but has never been found guilty.

> You look around frantically for more dackers.
You spot another dacker sitting in a corner in a drugged state, he is no use to you.

> You say "Hey you might not remember me, because I have not yet revealed my true self, but I remember you. Do you have any more drugs on you? "
"I've got a few on me."
"Well give me what you've got, I need them, not much is it?
The three of us get up on my trusty pale old horse and ride away.
We arrive at a large house and I go through the front door.
The woman of the house is there waiting, she looks shocked to see us...

Brilliant!!!!!111111oneoneone


You are Grumblepumpin the deserver. You're in a hotel lobby, staring down Nancy Pelosi.

"What do you want?" she says. "I'm not here to kill you."

> You say "That's not what your actions say Nancy."
You smile at her and nod. "Yes it is," you say. "And I'm sorry for that."

> You disract her bodyguards.
You take out a gun and shoot two of her bodyguards, and then run for the door. You hear shots behind you, but you don't care.

> You kidnap nancy.
You grab Nancy, and run. You look at her frightened face. You sprint to the limo, and get in, driving off before the cops can do anything.
"Oh my God," she says.

> You say "Wow, that escalated quickly."
"This isn't funny!" she says. "I need to get back to the house. Can you drop me off at my house?"
"No. I'm sorry, but I can't.

> You say "Undress, I need to know that you're not a man."
She smiles weakly. "I'm not. I'm a woman."

> You say "Are you sure*"
"Yes! Yes I'm sure."
"I can't tell."
"Trust me," she says. "Now stop talking, I have to get back home before my parents."

> You say "I think your parents are dead. You're old you know"
"I know!" she says, almost with a snap. "Just drive the f*ck car!"
You drive off.
"Um, where to now?" you ask.
"Take a left,"

> You say "Ummmm, I kidnapped you, I'm in charge here"
"Oh, spikey. Fine then take a right up there and head back to the city."
"Where should I take you?"
"Anywhere! Just keep going!"
"Ok,"

> You say "I'M IN CHARGE!"
You pull over and take out your cell phone and call 911.
"911, what is your emergency?" The operator on the other end asks.

> You say "Hi operator, I've been kidnapped by Nancy Pelosi, she keeps telling me where to drive."
After some silence, the operator says "I'm sending help right now, hold on."
You hold on as your ears begin to ring with static and a loud buzzing.

> You wait for the cops, while distracting Nancy.
You continue to wait patiently as your kidnapper drives. After a few minutes you begin to worry, as you hear no sirens.

> You get naked.
You pull down your jeans and panties, before taking off your shirt. You put on the clean clothes you have in your bag, then check one last time to make sure you have everything.

> You check if you're a man.
You find that you're a flashlight, and sit down to wait.
"Ah hah!" you smile to yourself.
Suddenly, you hear a police car screech into view, and then... Stop.

> You say "Help! Nancy has kidnapped me!"
You yell towards the top of your lungs, before realizing what a stupid idea this is.
"Ah f*ck," you grunt angrily.
You wait patiently for the police to arrive.

> You say "Nancy are you still with me?"
"Yes, sorry,"
The screeching of the tires gets louder and louder as we pull away from the hotel.

> You say "I'm getting confused nancy, things seem disjointed"
"We're going back to your house. I had to make sure you were alive."
"Do you want a cup of tea?"
"Okay."

> You say "Could you please touch me?"
As she touches you, you feel sad, almost as if someone had turned off the sun to your entire life. You feel a deep sadness and frustration wash over you.
"Do you want a cookie?

> You say "Do you have any interns Nancy?"
"I used to have two."
"Ah, that's good then."
You look around the car and see that the driver is looking at you, so you decide to try another topic.

> You say "Can we go visit them; do a Clinton maybe while you watch?"
"Sure."
"We could go on a reality show or two. You know, get back to the intern thing."
"Are you sure they'd let us in?"
Masturbate
"They wouldn't know what hit them," you laugh.

> You go see Obama.
You go through the drive-thru at a fast food joint, then get a large coke and 1/4 pound cheese burger.

> You say "So that's where he works nowadays. Who would have thought, huh Nancy?"
"Ah yes, the fast food industry. Truly a good place for a struggling family to work with a lot of benefits."
"Or a terrorist cell," you suggest.

> You say "We should take it out. The terrorist cell. You and I Nancy"
"Or we could take it out."
"Together," you suggest.
"I can't do that."
You sigh, before taking a large bite of your burger.
"Why not?"

> You say "I know you can get us some gund"
"I can't get you drugs."
"You don't need to get me drugs, I can get them myself. I'm not a stupid college kid.

> You say "Sorry. GUNS, get us some GUNS Nancy, so we can attack the fast food joint"
"That's even worse. You're not even funny."
"What about the suicide bombers then?"
"That's just as bad. No wait, don't do that."

> You oK, NANCY, you'll just get the gund yourself then.
You spend the rest of the afternoon trying to find a gun store, but you can't find one anywhere.
"They must be doing something illegal," you shrug.

> You fetch your automatic rifle and a pistol for Nancy.
You head home, and make sure your gun is loaded and ready to go. You also tuck a large knife into your boot.
"Dear God, please let this work,"

> You say "Are you ready to do this nancy, just think of tomorrows headlines"
"Ready when you are," she replies.
You pull up to the hotel, and get out. You walk up to the entrance and look at the security guard.
"How's it going?"

> You enter the fast food joint and kill everyone together with Nancy.
"Think we should go in together?"
"Sure," you say. "If we split up, we might not be recognized and get lost in the crowd."
"Let's get this done then,"

> You enter the fast food joint.
You walk inside, looking around. You see a long counter with ordering slots for people to use, and little tables with stools by the weed.

> You kill the cashier.
You head over to the counter, raising your gun. You put your hand on the gun, pointing it at the neck of the cashier.
"Please don't put your hand on my gun,"

> You shoot.
Your gun explodes in your face, and you feel the impact as your shoulder explodes in pain. You stumble backward, hitting the door behind you and falling to the ground with a thud.

> You say "Shoot them nancy!"
"Ok!"
Nancy fires her gun at the cashier, and the man's chest explodes in blood.
"Come on,"
You stand up and run over to the counter.

> You say "Shoot the weed staff"
Nancy takes out her gun and fires at the weed staff, and they fall to the ground in a bloody heap.
"Now open the safe"
You see the cashiers hand go under the counter.

> You say "Shoot him Nancy!"
"I'm trying!"
Nancy is straining to aim her gun at the cashier, but can't get a clear shot.
"You've done your part, now let me have a go,"

> You say "Rip his heas off"
You walk over to the cashier, and rip the front off of his shirt.
"Now get his hands up!"
Nancy fires her gun at the cashier, blasting his chest open.

> You go inte the small office.
You enter the small office behind the counter and see several security guards pointing guns at you.
"Oh great, more guns," you say.
You see a small safe behind the counter.

> You say "Shoot them Nancy!"
Nancy fires at the guards, but misses them.
"Get in there and get the safe!"
You run behind the counter and pull open the safe, grabbing the bag of money inside.

> You decapitate the terrorist security guards.
You walk over to the bleeding terrorist guards and raise your knife, raising it up to one of their heads. You stab down, cutting his neck open.

> You kill more terrorists.
You walk up to the counter and begin counting the money, ignoring the mess you've made of the weed.

> You say "So Nancy, let's call the papers"
"Good idea, I'm sure we'll be famous,"
You walk over to the pay phone by the entrance and begin making calls.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAhHH

I decided to try the limits of the AI with this piece, I call it "the patient".



I am blind. I am running on an even slope, I have been running forever. I am screaming continually and I feel my face vibrating with each new breath as I scream out in long loud roar.

"No! No!" I cry out to the sky. "Please no! Please no!"

The wind is blowing hard now, but it's not enough to blow me away.

> You scream louder. Run faster.
I can't stop myself from screaming at this point. I'm going to die here, and that's just not fair.

"NO!" I shout again, louder than ever before. "NO! NO!"

> You say yes! Yes! Yes!
I want to live. I want to live so much. I run faster than ever before, and I'm not stopping until I reach the top of the slope.
I can't stop screaming, but that's okay.

> You start jumping.
I'm at the top of the slope, and I'm jumping on the spot. I can't stop screaming.
I'm jumping up and down, and I can't stop screaming.

> You flail your arms and shit your pants.
I'm flailing my arms about and screaming. I can't stop screaming.
I'm flailing my arms about and screaming, but then I fall over.
I'm lying on the ground, and I can't stop screaming.

> You piss yourself.
I'm lying on the ground, and I'm pissing myself. I can't stop screaming.
I'm pissing myself and screaming, but then I feel a hand on my shoulder.
"It's okay," says a deep voice.

> You close your mouth after a big exhalation. you draw the next furious inhalation all through your nostrils to try and smell his stranger.
You close your mouth after a big exhalation. You draw the next furious inhalation all through your nostrils to try and smell his stranger.
"It's okay," says a deep voice. "You're going to be fine."

> You smell the stranger.
You smell the stranger. He smells like a hospital. You can make out the smell of the disinfectant they use to wipe down the trolley they put you on when they take you into the operating theatre.
You smell the stranger.

> You start screaming again.
You start screaming again. You don't know why, but you just feel like you need to.
"It's okay," says a deep voice. "You're going to be fine."
You start screaming again.

> You try to bite the stranger.
You try to bite the stranger. He catches your head in his hands and holds it firmly in place.
"It's okay," he says. "You're going to be fine."
You try to bite the stranger.

> You force evacuation of your bowels.
You force evacuation of your bowels. You feel a huge release as a long, thick turd starts squeezing its way out of your arsehole.

> You smell that stench.
You smell that stench. It's the worst thing you've ever smelled in your entire life. It smells like a thousand rotting corpses, all piled on top of each other, soaked in petrol, and set alight.

> You have a grand mal seizure.
You have a grand mal seizure. You feel your body go into violent convulsions as you start to shake all over.
"It's okay," says a deep voice. "You're going to be fine."

> You spit and scream towards the stranger, the start projectile vomiting.
You spit and scream towards the stranger, then start projectile vomiting. You vomit all over yourself, but you don't give a flying leapin' frigate bird because you're in the middle of having a grand mal seizure.

The last part was pretty good, didn't fit apparently :


> You pass out.
You pass out. You don't know how long you're out for, but when you come to, you find that you're covered in vomit and piss, lying in the dirt next to a dead man.
"It's okay,"

ehue, that was.... graphic.

I wanna hear more Nancy Pelosi adventures �

Not much action is this one... Nancy keeps dereiling the plot.

....................................



Generating story...
...

You are Grumblepumpin the deserver. You've started your fifth cigarette by the Washington Memorial when nancy Pelosi, congresswoman, terrorist slayer, and you partner, finally shows up.

"I'm here," she says with a smile. "What brings you to my district?"

"My name is Grumblepumpin.

> You i'm glad you got your message Nancy, you've got a lead for another terorrist cell.
"Yeah, I know who you're talking about.

> You do?
"Yeah, yeah, now where are they?"
"Call it a hunch, but they're going to be in an abandoned gas station at the cross roads of Buck Road and Creptown Road.

> You say "Meet me tonight in the lobby of the Washington Hilton. We'll plan the operation out and maybe have a drink."
"Perfect," Nancy says, "See you there at 8."
"Tonight?" you say, wondering what brought on the sudden change of plans.
She squints at you.

> You say "Sorry, my short term memory isn't what it used to be. Took a rubber bullet to the hypothalamus in Bankok five years ago."
"Okay, I'll see you at seven then," she says and takes out her cell phone and disappears into the crowd.
You swear you recognize that face...

> You go to your room at the washington hilton.
You go to your room at the Washington Hilton.
You start taking off your clothes as you walk toward your room and find yourself really enjoying the feeling of the crisp sheets under your butt.

> You wait until 8, or maybe 7.
o You watch the news or something
You put on a DVD, something starring Mel Gibson and eat some pretzels.
At nine you call down to the desk and ask how Nancy is doing.

> You go down to the lobby and meet up with Nancy.
You go down to the hotel lobby and find Nancy.
"Hey, haven't seen you in a while," she says. "How are things."
"Still standing,"

> You say "Let's sit don by the bar and plan the operation."
"Sounds good to me,"
You and Nancy sit down by the hotel bar.
"So here's the deal,"

> You say "Tell me straight Nancy, are you a man?"
Nancy blushes and looks into her drink.
"Erm, well, yeah," she says. "Have you seen my gender displayed correctly?"

> You say "Hah, I knew it! I'm OK with that. Have you had corrective surgery?"
"Yeah, I had it a year ago."

> You say "And a titjob?"
"What?"
"A Toyota Camry and some reliable encryption software?"
"What?"
"Nevermind."
"Seriously, what's this all about?" she asks.

> You say "The operation. The terrorist cell."
"Wait," she replies, "You can see through my clothes?"
"It's just an operation. A simple cut and sew. You'll be walkin' around the camp completely naked after it's done."

> You say "What?"
"I'm not having 'parts' cut off while I'm conscious and having my innards..."
"Innards?

> You say "Forget it Nancy. We need to raid the terrorist cell tonight okay?"
"Yeah, yeah," she says, waving your concerns away.
"Now then, tell me about this camp," you say.
"What do you want to know specifically?"
"Everything.

> You say "Stop it Nancy, you're doing it again."
"Doing what?" she asks.
"Using words I don't understand," you reply.
She smiles and gives you her full attention.
"There's a river running south to north through the camp,"

> You say "The gas station. It's a gas station."
"A gas station?" she asks, "How complex."
"Simple. The gas station sells fuel, which powers cars. Cars need fuel. Where there's fuel, there's gotta be a car. Simple."

> You say "Nevermind. We should get going. Wait for me outside"
"Sure,"
You and Nancy walk outside of the hotel.
"So, how far is it?" asks Nancy.
"Shut up and follow me,"

> You fetch the AR-15, Nancy's Desert Eagle, and some fragmentation grenades from Günther, the former Waffen SS.
You walk back into the hotel with the rifle over your shoulder and the pistols in your hands. You find Nancy waiting for you by the car.
You get into the passenger seat and buckle up.

> You drive to the gas station with the headlights off.
As you approach the gas station, you notice there's no one outside. The gas station is completely dark.
Nancy pulls up to the gas station and puts the car in park. You look at her.

> You say "We should wait in the car for a while just to be sure"
"Wait in the car?" she asks.

> You say "Yeah, and observe to gas station."
"What about the guards?"
"We can handle two unarmed guard, don't worry," you reply.
"Sure, let's do it," she says, unbuckling her seat belt.

> You say "Stop Nancy! I said we should WAIT"
Nancy turns around and looks at you.
"What?" she asks.
"I said... STOP! We should wait in the car!" you yell.
"For what?" she says, raising her voice.

> You say "Shhhhh, keep your voice down"
"I don't understand," she says, "I thought you had a plan.

> You say "I DO have a plan, and part of it is waiting in the car for the love of god and all that is holy! How did you ever get elected."
"Oh that," she says.
"Yeah, that," you reply. "That was the first thing I thought of when I saw your name. How could I not run?"
"Well..."

> You wait for five minutes.
Nancy unbuckles her seat belt and turns toward you.
"We should go inside," she says. "I don't like this."
You get out of the car and walk around to the trunk.

> You grab your guns and enter the gas station.
You open the trunk and grab your guns, then go around to the passenger side of the car. You open the door and motion Nancy to get out of the car.

> You say "We should enter through the back. They'll never see us coming"
As you and Nancy walk around the side of the building, you slow down and try to look casual.

> You kick the back door in and go in guns blazing.
You walk quickly around the corner of the building and kick the back door in. You walk inside the building and look around. The place is completely empty.

> You look for hidden doors'
You slowly walk around the room, checking if there is a trapdoor to an underground area.
"Nope, just a bunch of shelves."
"Shelfs?" asks Nancy in confusion.

> You say "But where are they. This place should be crawling with chinese terrorists"
Nancy shrugs.
"I don't know," she says. "Wherever they are, we should look for them when we're done here."
"Do you think they might have left this place?"

> You say "I don't know. My source said they'd be here."
"Well, where is your source?" asks Nancy. "Because I told you what was going on, and that's all he told me."
"W..

> You say "You're not making any sense. Let's look for a hidden entrance"
"I don't think we should bother," she says. "This place is abandoned, and we know where the terrorists are right now."
"We can't take that chance.

> You say "We do? Where are they?"
Nancy turns around and walks over to a table. She pulls down a manilla folder and shows you a picture.
"That's where they are," she says.

> You say "And where is that?"
"It's a lodge in the mountains. I told you about it earlier."
"Ah yes. But what if they have more men there?"
"We go there and wipe them out.

> You say "No you didn't tell me shit Nancy. But yeah, we should go there."
"Don't be so sure, there might be a back up plan.
"Let's go."
You grab the manilla folder and walk over to the door.
"Where are you going?

> You say "To the cabin"
"To the cabin," you say.
"That's where I'm going," says Nancy. "You're not?"
"I don't know, what if they have more men there?"

> You say "Never mind. Let's go. Can I see your tits before we go?"
"Sure," says Nancy, unbuckling her belt.
Nancy pulls down her jeans and underpants to reveal she is not wearing any clothing underneath. The look on your face must be interesting.
"What?"

> You say "I had no idea that's where you kept them"
"What are you talking about?"
Now you hold your hands behind your head.

> You say "When you said you had surgery I imagined that you'd have gotten yourself a vagina, not a pair of tits down there."
"Surgery? I thought you said they gave you the all clear."
"I did, but..."
"So why did you ask me to pull down my pants?"
Well now.

> You say "Never mind. Let's go find us the terrorists."



..... TO BE CONTINUED

Nancy always on track isn't she?

Now with multiplayer, it seems.

Use this code to join: 0URrDXx7

Let's play AI DAC. Download the app. It's easier.

redacted

Game Over:

I too want a poster that says "tps reports and mops, a way of life"